Theists: How can predetermined fate and free will coexist?

[Tonus]

He wrote himself in as the one who experiences all of those rapes, murders, hunger, and tragedies (he really suffers the experience of every particular rape, murder, hunger and tragedy) on the cross. He never wrote a single moment of suffering into the story without writing his own suffering of that same moment.

This is something that seems creepy to me. It also seems excessive and, in the end, not very useful.

Humans are made in the image of god, which means we can empathize and sympathize with others. We can understand many feelings on some level and share many common experiences, so we are driven to be compassionate when we hear of someone going through a particularly bad experience. We may not have gone through the experience ourselves, but we feel compelled to express that compassion in various ways. We know that there are humans who have risked their lives --and lost them-- in order to spare someone else a particular fate. We know that humans give of their money and time to help people who are poor and hungry. Who have been through the trauma of rape or are feeling suicidal. Who have seen the horrors of war, and so on. Many of the people who volunteer their time and money have not experienced these things, or have not done so on the same level. Yet they are compelled to help.

Why would Jesus need to experience EVERY SINGLE human tragedy in order to understand it, or to act to alleviate it? Was he incapable of empathy or sympathy? Was God just a soulless automaton until he hung on the cross and experienced millions of individual events of suffering and pain? Why wouldn't such a traumatic experience convince him to do something about it right then and there, instead of leaving humanity hanging for almost two thousand years now, during which even more people have suffered the experiences that he now understands on a direct and personal level? Perhaps he was driven mad by the experience? Or perhaps his return to godhood made the whole thing so manageable that he was able to shake it off? Even a single traumatic experience can completely ruin a person. So many all at once would have forced a normal person's brain to shut down for good. Maybe God cannot feel empathy or sympathy for us because his super-brain is impervious to the effects of traumatic human experience?