Insatiable Flirt

[freedomfromforum]

But if my level of confidence was in so much in need of recognition from other people, especially from a single person, and then trying to get their attention such as by flirting, then the boost is not as real as I would like to think.

It would be more of an illusory boost because it implies that I am willing to assess myself mostly through someone else's mind and less through my own.

I merely stated that observing oneself performing well in a preferred venue provides a genuine boost.

I'm good at many things, and observing myself performing well in those areas gives me a REAL boost of self-confidence, because it demonstrates that I have good reason to be confident in myself.

(emphasis added)

If I tune my car, and it runs flawlessly because I am a skilled technician, would I be using someone else to boost my ego simply because they may be impressed by my skills, or would I get a REAL boost from taking delight in reaping the joy of my skill and labor.

The distinction may be a subjective one. I never insinuated that I assess my skill level by the recognition of others. I said that I assess them from my own observation. I provide my own feedback based very loosely on the responsiveness of others.