Do you ever miss it?

[Jackalope]

There are times when I wish I had a crutch to lean on, particularly in hard times such as what I'm going through now (most of which is already public knowledge). In the past couple of days I have felt that having faith would help me through the next couple of days. My stepmother is dying, and I'm going to say my last goodbye on Sunday. It's extremely unlikely that she will live to see the new year. All of this came down in the last few hours.

Alas, I have no faith, and I can't force myself to and so I will get through this the best that I can. So I would have to say that I only miss it a tiny bit when I'm faced with extremely difficult situations where faith would make the pain not seem so bad.

Nothing much else to say on the subject, really.

[Erinome]

Just remember that pain is temporary.

What comforts me a little when I lose someone I love is trying to remember, even writing down all the things that person taught me. Then I try to teach someone else something I learned from them whenever I have the opportunity. This gives people their immortality. Have faith in yourself that you're strong enough to bear this, and in time your weaknesses will be wisdom, and possibly strength.

If we love someone, they will live as long as we do.

[houseofcantor]

Just remember that pain is temporary.

What comforts me a little when I lose someone I love is trying to remember, even writing down all the things that person taught me. Then I try to teach someone else something I learned from them whenever I have the opportunity. This gives people their immortality. Have faith in yourself that you're strong enough to bear this, and in time your weaknesses will be wisdom, and possibly strength.

If we love someone, they will live as long as we do.

All the better for my not saying it.

The first time I saw my father was in a casket, my mother passed from bone cancer; I watched my grandfather fade from stroke. I don't remember so much as crying. A week ago we were gathered in the hangout for the passing of the Hitch, that seems to have affected me more than my relations; that because I was angry. I come across as cold in the face of grief; not because I do not care, or I lack sympathy, but rather because I use a different form of mathematics. Nothing is lost.

All that faith gives the faithful is the shared identity of god. The only meaningful equivalence of that identity is god=love. Lose the agency and the idolatry; can not an atheist have faith in love? I'm thinking, yes.

[zip_ster]

When I lost my parents, we their family and friends were there for each other. The church barely showed up on my radar.
I do miss some of the people sometimes.
I don't miss the BS at all. In fact I still wish I were in a place to tell religious folks to shove it.

[LarissaAnn]

The friendliness and caring was as you said warm and fuzzy. Our old church donated a lot of food to us after my brother's suicide which was wonderful and made us all feel very cared for...and yes we thanked them very warmly and gave them a donation for their caring, it goes hand in hand with my theory that religion does do some good in the world and we very much appreciated their kindness...but do I miss the backwardness, prejudice inspiring messages or singing twelve hundred songs over and over again in a couple hours time, absolutely not.

I would go back out of curiosity, family reasons (such as taking my Grandma), to admire the pretty buildings (lol I'm an art fan) or like aleialoura said to see it through Atheist eyes.

[Aegrus]

I was never very religious, so no, I don't have many memories to miss.

[Ziploc Surprise]

If you were deeply religious before, do you ever miss the warm fuzzies, the church potlucks, the sense of security (albeit false), and the comfort of it all?
I miss the (false sense of) safety and security I got from my sky daddy. I miss conversing with the sky daddy in prayer. The sense of peace I got after talking things out. When times are difficult or uncertain, this is when I feel it. God is a portable friend. Sometimes this makes me want to go back, but how can you go back to what never really was?

I don't miss the cognitive dissonance that comes from having to wrestle with things in the Bible. Homosexuality, evolution, pre marital sex, gender roles, unanswered prayer, all of the unanswered questions....the list goes on. I feel a great relief in not having to play the apologist anymore. I can call bullshit bullshit.


What keeps you from going back for a little taste of it?
I wanted to go to a Christmas service. I have always loved singing Christmas carols. When I was in College I was involved in a youth group. Though I pissed off scores of people with my incessant questioning and theorizing I still has a group of friends who were accepting of me. I miss this. The older I became the less acceptable my questioning and theorizing became and the lonelier I became.

Sunday is now my day of rest (I sleep in). Seriously though Church was never a very good place for me. I am very educated, I read voraciously, and I have a high I.Q, but I felt like a turd in a punch bowl. I had difficulty communicating with people. Christians often treated me like an idiot because they couldn't understand me. It can be very lonely in the fundamentalist world. There are almost no intellectuals there. No one to talk with, not even on the Christian forums.

I learned to keep my mouth shut to avoid rejection. People want simple answers to questions, not complicated answers. If you can't grab someone's attention in three sentences or less then you've lost them. The problem is that for every question someone askd I had often read about three books on the subject. How do you condense 3 books worth of information down to two sentences and have it make any sense? It's best to keep your mouth shut to avoid humiliation.

As for sermons, they are boring. Most of the time I knew more about the subject than the preacher. I listened to the sermon out of obedience. The Bible says you are supposed to go to church, so I did. Yawn!!

Another thing I don't miss is that churches favor the rich, those without a lot of money are not important. Sometimes poorer people who have a stunning personality can break through the prejudice but if you lack one of these stunning personalities you are just a nameless face. I don't miss this sort of discrimination at all.


Have you sought to replace these things with realistic experiences?
I read.
As for the social things I attend a local Atheist meet up group and I go to a theology class with a few Unitarians.
I have not been able to replace the good feelings I got from my spiritual experiences. Any suggestions?

---

There are times when I wish I had a crutch to lean on, particularly in hard times such as what I'm going through now (most of which is already public knowledge). In the past couple of days I have felt that having faith would help me through the next couple of days. My stepmother is dying, and I'm going to say my last goodbye on Sunday. It's extremely unlikely that she will live to see the new year. All of this came down in the last few hours.

Alas, I have no faith, and I can't force myself to and so I will get through this the best that I can. So I would have to say that I only miss it a tiny bit when I'm faced with extremely difficult situations where faith would make the pain not seem so bad.

Nothing much else to say on the subject, really.

I sympathize. I find myself wishing I had a crutch to lean on, I feel like having faith might help me through something. Faith can have a way of making things not feel so bad. tough times can also be lonely times. I can't even say I'll pray for you because, of course, prayer makes no difference when there is no god. I do sympathize though.

[HarryStanluv25]

I was one of those kids who never really felt like I belonged or 'fit in' at church. Especially at the kid events and Sunday school. So I don't really have much to miss. If anything I miss going to church on Christmas Eve with my mom and sister. I miss singing and hearing Christmas songs with others. Apparently my mom went to a real nice mass this Christmas Eve and said even I might like it. So if things work out come Dec I will like to go to another mass with her, even though I don't believe. I still love the spirit the month of December brings and will always love those Jesus-related holiday songs. I'd go, for her. But I vowed to myself years ago I will not attend another regular mass ever again. I just cannot and do not want to step into a church and 'pretend' to like or believe anything taking place. I would feel so uncomfortable there. So ya, regular mass I shall never go to again. I do not miss it and have no reason to go. If that upsets certain family members... they'll just never accept my beliefs. :/

[houseofcantor]

Last year Pauline Israelite was my cover story. Went to this place called Open Door Fellowship, a fifteen minute walk down the street, round the corner, up the road. First time I went, hadda test it - man, it wuz rock and roll; coupla cats telling stories, more rock, the it was time to go. Good enough. I go read the handbook, see how many rules I'm breaking. I tell one cat I work for YHWH; this other guy, I was like - I believe in the Jesus in you - Old Testament Christian; ever hear of such a thing? That wuz me!

Two months later, I gotta screw. I'm guilty of blaspheme. How's that? In my mind, when they say "god is good," I gotta say, not. When they say too many Jesuses, I gotta substitute the Gwynnies. The last thingy was a discussion about my conviction that evolution, not creation, is referenced in scripture; with the adult pastor, and the scent of fear.

That's what it is to be a journeyman prophet - scare the fuck outta the sheep, tell you whut!

I don't miss them. I'm willing to bet they miss me. I used my middle name - John - in church. When I was a regular, I'd walk down these streets; with the smiles and the waves, "hi, John!" When I stopped going, so to the familiarity of the community. Nobody knows Eddie; I like it that way. It's all so very cozy to be one of the pretentious herd; all it was, a sharing of the identity. I don't have the identity of a Christian; why would I, an atheist with YHWH. How'd I get YHWH? By following the script, becoming Lucifer, and stealing shit; how else? Do you know what to steal? Dominion from Adam, that's the key; dominion is the right of Name. Name is Power - it's all witchcraft; and all a prophet is, is a form of witch.

And when you don't burn the witches, look what happens?

[KichigaiNeko]

I continue to be "the outsider" looking in to the madness of religion.... and happy to be so