Why Mafia is Better than the Government

[Koolay]

A list of things that make Mafia objectively better than Government:

-The Mafia does not ask for paper work when they take your property, less overhead.

-The Mafia has a code of honour they abide by, it varies from different gangs, but usually they refuse to kill children, or old people and sometimes refuse to kill women. The government kills children by the thousands.

-When Mafias go to war, they don't kill civilians not part of the war/rivalry.

-The Mafia is more efficient; all the hundreds of thousands of regulations and enforced rules makes doing anything take forever. The Mafia has very simple rules.

-The Mafia wants 10-15% of your profits, whereas the various governments want at least 40-50% of your profits.

-The Mafia won't interfere if you wish to buy a firearm, but the government wants to throw you in a cage for owning a firearm. The Mafia would gladly sell you firearms to protect your friends and family.

-The Mafia does not indoctrinate your children 5 days a week, in fact, they will stay out of your personal life once you pay them off.

-The Mafia does not interfere with your personal life, how you conduct your personal life is irrelevant. The Government wants to throw you in a cage if you do not behave how they want.

-If you buy security from the Mafia, you will actually get security because they want more of your business. Government police, just want to get through 9 to 5, it doesn't matter to them if you are actually satisfied with their services or not, they don't make any less money if they do a shitty job.

[Anomalocaris]

I totally agree with you. You should immediately go to the Mafia and ask them to protect your right to disagree with them.

I means now.

[pineapplebunnybounce]

[Kayenneh]

I agree.

[Captain Colostomy]

Hmm...taxation with representation and due process, or hyper inflated loans and 'Sicilian Neckties'...

Fuhgeddaboutit.

[Minimalist]

[Tonus]

These mafia guys sound pretty reasonable, now that I think abou--



Oh, nevermind.

[My imaginary friend is GOD]

I've figured it out now. Koolay is a libertarian. This is why he thinks capitalism is moral, while government is immoral. It is also why everything he posts is crazy as fuck. Because libertarians are crazy fucks.

[Crossless2.0]

I've figured it out now. Koolay is a libertarian. This is why he thinks capitalism is moral, while government is immoral. It is also why everything he posts is crazy as fuck. Because libertarians are crazy fucks.

It's also why he believes that his precious profits are made in some kind of magical vacuum, rather than acknowledging that his enterprises rest on a body of laws enacted and enforced by *gasp* government and on a vast system of infrastructure paid for by *gasp* public funds. Don't even get me started on the markets that exist today because of publicly funded research.

The venality and stupidity of "libertarian philosophy" (I assume the quotation marks speak for themselves) is something to behold.

[Cyberman]

Y'know, since I'm mostly on the mobile version of the site, I'll often see a thread title and take a moment to wonder who the author is before clicking it.

Congratulations, Koolay, for unfailingly dispensing with that air of mystery.