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RE: Trying to Decide Something
March 20, 2015 at 2:15 am
(March 20, 2015 at 1:50 am)Lemonvariable72 Wrote: Before I get into my opinion on this I'm going out line a few assumptions that factor into what I'm thinking.
1. That this man is reasonably good looking and that he is very intelligent.
Yes, and yes. I wouldn't have gotten engaged to someone I wasn't attracted to or who wasn't intelligent.
Quote:2. that the sex in Europe was amazing.
Well, we only had sex in Europe twice. I had my friend with me and we were staying in youth hostels. We had a crap-ton of great sex when we were living together in Australia, though.
Quote:Now the reason I outline those assumptions is because those are the things that stick with us even when we forget other things. Our brains choose to remember the good things over the bad, and 14 years is a long time to remember. So you may want to consider that you may romantizing your memories without being really aware of it.
Well, it's only been eleven years since we've seen each other, and you'd mostly be right, but I have real-time evidence of what was going on: my crazily-detailed journals. I'm relatively confident I'm remembering things correctly, romantic and not.
Quote:So really dig down and think what feeling this may cause to relive and weither you want those feelings or not. I also know that relationships between people with mental health issues can be explosive and intense affairs, so be prepared for the possibility of him or his family being resentFul, as well as the possibility of overwhelming emotions on your part.
His family, even in the worst of it, was supportive to both of us. I remember having a two-hour convo with his mum after we decided to break up. She wanted us both to be happy; would have preferred it if we were together. It was just really hard for us.
Quote:You also have to consider the possibility of emotions it could set off in him, given that he may still have a highly impulsive personality.
I'm not saying don't do it, your capable and intelligent woman, but think hard on what this can do to you and what you hope to gain.
I am definitely considering that; his emotional health is the main reason I'm having trouble with this. I don't want him to have any bad feelings ever at all.
Thanks Lemon 
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RE: Trying to Decide Something
March 20, 2015 at 2:19 am
You were smart to keep a journal. I wish I'd done that.
To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.
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RE: Trying to Decide Something
March 20, 2015 at 2:22 am
(March 20, 2015 at 2:19 am)Lemonvariable72 Wrote: You were smart to keep a journal. I wish I'd done that.
You know? Sometimes I'm good about it, and then there will be years that go by and I don't journal at all. Right now, I am, but as of a few months ago, I hadn't kept one in two years. Sometimes, too, I've just thrown them out when I've filled them. These, I happened to keep and found them in a bin in my mom's basement. I don't think I even remembered I'd been that detailed with them.
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RE: Trying to Decide Something
March 20, 2015 at 2:30 am
(March 20, 2015 at 2:22 am)rexbeccarox Wrote: (March 20, 2015 at 2:19 am)Lemonvariable72 Wrote: You were smart to keep a journal. I wish I'd done that.
You know? Sometimes I'm good about it, and then there will be years that go by and I don't journal at all. Right now, I am, but as of a few months ago, I hadn't kept one in two years. Sometimes, too, I've just thrown them out when I've filled them. These, I happened to keep and found them in a bin in my mom's basement. I don't think I even remembered I'd been that detailed with them. I suppose the only other tip I can say is well, don't let it get you down if shot don't go well.
To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.
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RE: Trying to Decide Something
March 20, 2015 at 2:31 am
Thanks Lemon
I'll be ok.
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RE: Trying to Decide Something
March 21, 2015 at 3:24 am
This is ridiculous! I can't deal! He added me to his circles, but he's not responding to my messages. What do I do? I'm so close to booking a trip to Oz. I can't help it; feeling so crazy!
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RE: Trying to Decide Something
March 21, 2015 at 3:29 am
(This post was last modified: March 21, 2015 at 3:30 am by robvalue.)
For what it's worth, I think going out there with the intent to see him when he appears not to be responding to you is too much of a risk. I fear it will end in disappointment. It sounds to me like he is messing with you, or at least not interested enough to make an effort 
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RE: Trying to Decide Something
March 21, 2015 at 3:33 am
(March 21, 2015 at 3:29 am)robvalue Wrote: For what it's worth, I think going out there with the intent to see him when he appears not to be responding to you is too much of a risk. I fear it will end in disappointment. It sounds to me like he is messing with you, or at least not interested enough to make an effort
I'm there, Rob. Not happy about it, but I know what you're saying. It sucks rubbing my own nose in the things I fucked up
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RE: Trying to Decide Something
March 21, 2015 at 3:37 am
(March 21, 2015 at 3:24 am)rexbeccarox Wrote: This is ridiculous! I can't deal! He added me to his circles, but he's not responding to my messages. What do I do? I'm so close to booking a trip to Oz. I can't help it; feeling so crazy!
Relax man. He probably just doesn't get on google+ that much, and you don't won a seem crazy
To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.
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30
RE: Trying to Decide Something
March 21, 2015 at 3:38 am
Remove Linkedin from the equation. Linkedin uses any loose casual relationship in their algorithm to suggest connections.
You make people miserable and there's nothing they can do about it, just like god.
-- Homer Simpson
God has no place within these walls, just as facts have no place within organized religion.
-- Superintendent Chalmers
Science is like a blabbermouth who ruins a movie by telling you how it ends. There are some things we don't want to know. Important things.
-- Ned Flanders
Once something's been approved by the government, it's no longer immoral.
-- The Rev Lovejoy
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