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Biblical Prayer Contradictions
#1
Biblical Prayer Contradictions
After reading parts of the bible recently, I became inspired by some divine force, to elaborate on the prayer contradiction that I first heard from George Carlin years ago. Hopefully you guys get some enjoyment out of it, and see how much more it actually contradicts itself with regards to god's will for us, and praying.

Keep in mind this verse: Pro 30:5-6 5 Every word of God is flawless; he is a shield to those who take refuge in him. 6 Do not add to his words, or he will rebuke you and prove you a liar.

- So, you're being a good little boy/girl, praying in your room. -- You start to realize that your prayers aren't being answered. -- You recite the classic, perpetual mantra of doom, "Maybe it's not god's will."

- However, I disagree. The bible says, whatever you ask for will be given to you. (Ps 34:17, Mk 11:24, Mt 21:22, Lk 11:9-13, Jn 14:13, Jn 15:7, Jn 16:23-24)

- Even though, still, your prayers go unanswered. Although, the bible, still tells us to pray unceasingly. (Col 4:2, 1 Thes 5:17-18)

- But, why would god ask you to pray, if he won't answer you? -- Why bother praying if the loving god knows what you need? -- The thought of prayer would have never come across your mind, because god would have provided what you needed in the first place.

- You decide to plead to god for wisdom. Jas 1:5 5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. Again, you're ignored.

- He, then, wants you to put your trust in him. Pro 3:5-6 5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

- After all of this, how can someone put their trust in him? Let's read on..1 Pet 6:7 6 Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. 7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Evidently, he cares for us.

- Eph 5:-17-19 17 Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is. 18 Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit, 19 speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit -- (I used to be jesus boy and talked like that, and nothing happened) How are we supposed to know god's will, if he won't answer our prayers or provide us with his wisdom? Aren't we already doing his will? Isn't everything going according to his plan? Obviously, no, according to my previous bullet points.

- In summation, he tells us that he will answer our prayers, then doesn't. He tells us to never cease from praying, even though he disregards us. He doesn't give us his wisdom, and he wants you to trust him without providing any evidence that he exists, let alone, evidence he actually cares. But, don't worry, he loves you. 1 Jn 4:8 8 Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This actually isn't true, because I love, and I do not know god. Also, if god was love, I'd know him!

- Don't forget to thank him for all of his love that he's bestowed upon you. (1 Chr 16:34, Col 3:17, 1 Thes 5:16-18, Ps 95:2, Ps 107:1, Ps 118:1, Ps 136:1) I'm certain I can poke more holes in god's holy word of absolute nonsense, but this will do for now. Any one else see any problems here? Christians, your faith shouldn't be this easy to dismantle. Any of you guys care to enlighten me here; am I not interpreting this right?
Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.' -Isaac Asimov-
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#2
RE: Biblical Prayer Contradictions
God answers every prayer.....with "no"



You can fix ignorance, you can't fix stupid.

Tinkety Tonk and down with the Nazis.




 








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#3
RE: Biblical Prayer Contradictions
Cognitive dissonance is served instead of the host in the catholic church and god has an identity crisis every couple of pages.... just be a good little altar boy, ignore the man behind the curtain and don't worry about the priest - 'tis god's will after all!
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#4
RE: Biblical Prayer Contradictions
(May 11, 2015 at 12:38 pm)downbeatplumb Wrote: God answers every prayer.....with "no"

Maybe we should try a different approach, "Please don't heal my friend that is dying of cancer. Please don't heal the paralyzed lower half of my body." Smile 

Our prayers would finally start getting answered, because we would be as evil as god.
Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.' -Isaac Asimov-
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#5
RE: Biblical Prayer Contradictions
Realistically, what expectation of prayers being answered could a Cafeteria Christian have ??

Someone wearing mixed fabric clothing, tattoos, clean shaven, hasn't set foot in a church between sundown Friday and sundown Saturday in his entire life, has shrimp breath and bacon grease stains on the aforementioned sinful clothing, banged wifey #2 the night before, won't swill poison, can't heal by laying on his hands, thinks Jesus was kidding about hating his parents with a Godly hate, let wives wear makeup, and doesn't communally own property with his congregation, just what is God going to do for this slacker when he's praying for the Cubbies to win a game ???

The guy is lucky God doesn't stuff 50,000 locusts down his pants.
 The granting of a pardon is an imputation of guilt, and the acceptance a confession of it. 




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#6
RE: Biblical Prayer Contradictions
'Please make the numbers on my digital clock change in a minute'

IT'S A MIRUCULLL!
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#7
RE: Biblical Prayer Contradictions
[Image: unanswered-prayers-of-children.jpg]
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#8
RE: Biblical Prayer Contradictions
If god is all seeing and all knowing, what is the point of praying? he knows what you want to pray about anyway... why waste his time telling him things he knows anyway? (and why do you have to go to a church to do it if he is everywhere?)   Huh
The meek shall inherit the Earth, the rest of us will fly to the stars.

Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups

Arguing with an engineer is like wrestling with a pig in mud ..... after a while you realise that the pig likes it!

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#9
RE: Biblical Prayer Contradictions
(May 11, 2015 at 1:33 pm)zebo-the-fat Wrote: If god is all seeing and all knowing, what is the point of praying? he knows what you want to pray about anyway... why waste his time telling him things he knows anyway? (and why do you have to go to a church to do it if he is everywhere?)   Huh

Although you are quite right in what you are suggesting, it is even worse than that.  One is trying to get God to do things, as if one knew better than God how things should go!

In other words, prayer is a kind of blasphemy, as it implicitly suggests that one is wiser than God!

"A wise man ... proportions his belief to the evidence."
— David Hume, An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding, Section X, Part I.
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#10
RE: Biblical Prayer Contradictions
So is cherry picking scriptures. Doesn't seem to phase the christers a bit.

Jesus needs to get a clue and start following His flock, cuz he sure ain't leading them.
 The granting of a pardon is an imputation of guilt, and the acceptance a confession of it. 




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