help?

[pocaracas]

What is this nonsense?!
Bosnian spies don't cut themselves!!
You filthy excuse for a spy!
Ten lashes!... no, I have a better idea... Bring out....

[Nope]

I wish that I could really hug you.

Has anything happened lately to make you feel the urge to hurt yourself?

[LastPoet]

I hope that this comes out as a joke, as it should be:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zxKJ-REbUlI

[Alex K]

It's good that you tell us.
If it helps I can look at you reproachfully and tell you to stop this nonsense
No, but seriously, I know you'll find the courage to contact a pro in one form or another. I know someone who did cut himself when he was in school. He's perfectly fine now, and you'll be, too.

Can I ask what the mechanism behind it is? What kind of emotional reaction does this type of stimulation facilitate that it becomes addictive? Is it some kind of processing of conflicts? Sorry, I'm curious.

[LastPoet]

It's good that you tell us.
If it helps I can look at you reproachfully and tell you to stop this nonsense
No, but seriously, I know you'll find the courage to contact a pro in one form or another. I know someone who did cut himself when he was in school. He's perfectly fine now, and you'll be, too.

Can I ask what the mechanism behind it is? What kind of emotional reaction does this type of stimulation facilitate that it becomes addictive? Is it some kind of processing of conflicts? Sorry, I'm curious.

I for one have been struggling with inherent pain as far as I remember. It also comes with a boiling anger, hatred that I can't let go, like a dam. I sought refuge in what would make me invincible, heroin. I can only wish for anybody here to not test it, amongst other stuff. for the last 14 years, I have dangled that burning desire, that shattered me into a billion pieces. I am no religious fellow, but I had a piece of me, chewed of. I can only strive to enjoy life for what it is, not what I wanted it to be.

[SteelCurtain]

Vic,

It breaks my heart to hear you say these things, but I am proud of you for bringing it out. That's very important. When you see a professional, you aren't required to out with it right away. Keep it superficial until you are comfortable enough to talk about more. Just remember, what you talk about in that setting is private and cannot be divulged except in specific instances. Sometimes, the greatest therapy is just in letting go, letting your problems be out in the open rather than bottled up inside.

Some things are rotten to talk about. They hurt, they bring up shitty feelings and emotions. Keep the end game in mind. Healthy, happy. The work is hell. But you gotta do it.

[shannonamyj]

(I'm REALLY anxious typing this so I'm sorry if it's incoherent)

I'm sorry if it's out of place, but I wanted to get this off my chest.

I cut myself and have fallen back to the habit recently. I'm not asking for pity, I want people to know because I want to stop and thought if many people knew, it would be harder for me to do it again. It's a lot like an addiction and I find myself craving more every time I do it, like a vicious cycle. I'm afraid it will get out of control and constantly paranoid about people noticing. I do it for the relief, out of anxiety and self-hatred, but after the relief the anxiety and guilt get even worse, so I do it again, and so it goes on. I don't want to go on like this. It's been less than 24 hours since the last time.

I'm sorry for bothering you all with this. Thanks just for reading the above.

Hi Neimenovic,
I'm sorry to hear about what you're going through. I've self harmed since I was around 9 years old and recently stopped, so if you'd like to talk about it feel free to contact me at any time, and I will try to reply as soon as I am able. Well done for being honest and posting this, it's so brave and a step in the right direction, so have hope.
P.S. please make sure the wound is clean! 
Stay safe x

[Longhorn]

sorry for the late reply, thank you guys immensely for the kind words and support

I wish that I could really hug you.

Has anything happened lately to make you feel the urge to hurt yourself?

I wish you could hug me too

just another one of those dumps I get into sometimes

It's good that you tell us.
If it helps I can look at you reproachfully and tell you to stop this nonsense

thanks but no need, I got this

No, but seriously, I know you'll find the courage to contact a pro in one form or another. I know someone who did cut himself when he was in school. He's perfectly fine now, and you'll be, too.

Can I ask what the mechanism behind it is? What kind of emotional reaction does this type of stimulation facilitate that it becomes addictive? Is it some kind of processing of conflicts? Sorry, I'm curious.

anxiety->self harm->relief or
numbness->self harm->feeling something


Im after a long honest talk with someone and I think now I'll be able to get it under control completely
thanks guys again, you're all great
(and no worries, the cuts are clean like a baby's butt)

[robvalue]

That's wonderful! You seem to have had a big change of attitude, and I'm very glad to hear it

I know all too well about anxiety and numbness.