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What's the most face-palm-worthy statement you have ever heard from a priest/preacher
#1
What's the most face-palm-worthy statement you have ever heard from a priest/preacher
I'm talking about the "is he living on the same planet?" or "did this guy pass 2nd grade?" statements.

And just so this doesn't turn into an attack on our AF Xtians (even though they do preach) I would like to request that you use something you heard in a church, on the TV, on the radio, etc.

I'll start:
I was sitting in a TX church many years ago, listening to the pastor pray using "thee" and "thou" and "thy" at every opportunity. After the service, a young man asked him why he used "thee" and "thy" instead of "you" and "your", and the preacher responded "You need to read GOD'S WORD, young man! This is the way THE LORD talked and wrote. We follow HIS example!"
Undecided
  Now, remember, there is a long-standing American tradition that preachers don't need to be literate -- they just need to be "called by God".  I really wanted to tell him why Jesus of Nazareth could not possibly have spoken King James' English, but I wouldn't have gotten out of there in one piece.  (And I was with my parents - who agreed with the preacher.)
"The family that prays together...is brainwashing their children."- Albert Einstein
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#2
RE: What's the most face-palm-worthy statement you have ever heard from a priest/preacher
Anything by either Hovind - they're interchangeable - Ham, Pendleton etc are low-hanging fruit. Too easy. So for my money I'd probably go with that pastor who got caught bragging about punching a kid in the chest for Jesus.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist.  This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair.  Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second.  That means there's a situation vacant.'
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#3
RE: What's the most face-palm-worthy statement you have ever heard from a priest/preacher
(August 19, 2015 at 12:06 pm)Stimbo Wrote: Anything by either Hovind - they're interchangeable - Ham, Pendleton etc are low-hanging fruit. Too easy. So for my money I'd probably go with that pastor who got caught bragging about punching a kid in the chest for Jesus.

I saw that one, Stimbo. It was mind-boggling.

Here's another:   A Priest talking about the glories of circumcision:

One was describing how the early church tried to require Gentiles to become circumcised in order to be Xtian. He was talking about what a wonderful practice it is, what a glorious way to remind men that they have a relationship with God. He said "I feel sorry for uncircumsized males. They don't have the joy of being reminded, every few hours, that they are special to god."  

I turned to a friend and said "did he really just say, every time I take a piss . . . " [Friend] "Yep. That's exactly what he said."
"The family that prays together...is brainwashing their children."- Albert Einstein
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#4
RE: What's the most face-palm-worthy statement you have ever heard from a priest/preacher
Age 13 in the deconversion moment. The youth pastor, getting tired of questions regarding evidence and inconsistencies stated " I don't have to prove anything to you, this is gods word and you must believe. That's why they call it faith!" He got up and stormed off. I was out.
I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem.
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#5
RE: What's the most face-palm-worthy statement you have ever heard from a priest/preacher
Josh Mutherfuckin' Feuerstien.
"There remain four irreducible objections to religious faith: that it wholly misrepresents the origins of man and the cosmos, that because of this original error it manages to combine the maximum servility with the maximum of solipsism, that it is both the result and the cause of dangerous sexual repression, and that it is ultimately grounded on wish-thinking." ~Christopher Hitchens, god is not Great

PM me your email address to join the Slack chat! I'll give you a taco(or five) if you join! --->There's an app and everything!<---
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#6
RE: What's the most face-palm-worthy statement you have ever heard from a priest/preacher
(August 19, 2015 at 12:21 pm)SteelCurtain Wrote: Josh Mutherfuckin' Feuerstien.

Or that lady that was screaming about some islAHmick extremlists
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#7
RE: What's the most face-palm-worthy statement you have ever heard from a priest/preacher
(August 19, 2015 at 12:25 pm)Neimenovic Wrote:
(August 19, 2015 at 12:21 pm)SteelCurtain Wrote: Josh Mutherfuckin' Feuerstien.

Or that lady that was screaming about some islAHmick extremlists



"There remain four irreducible objections to religious faith: that it wholly misrepresents the origins of man and the cosmos, that because of this original error it manages to combine the maximum servility with the maximum of solipsism, that it is both the result and the cause of dangerous sexual repression, and that it is ultimately grounded on wish-thinking." ~Christopher Hitchens, god is not Great

PM me your email address to join the Slack chat! I'll give you a taco(or five) if you join! --->There's an app and everything!<---
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#8
RE: What's the most face-palm-worthy statement you have ever heard from a priest/preacher
Wasn't a priest, but...

I was giving a guy a ride to the staging area at work, when we passed a Buddhist temple tucked away in the dense woods. Pretty impressive building. I made a remark that went something like "A Buddhist temple?!"

The guy goes "Yeaah, pssht. Tear it down. So stupid."
So far so good. I'm with him, it's pretty stupid.

He goes on "ohhh, a bunch of people praying to a fat guy. Dumb. Some people will believe anything. And the other people will do anything to get rich." Hmmm... This guy might be an atheist! Cool.

"There's only one true God." -_- dang.
I can't remember where this verse is from, I think it got removed from canon:

"I don't hang around with mostly men because I'm gay. It's because men are better than women. Better trained, better equipped...better. Just better! I'm not gay."

For context, this is the previous verse:

"Hi Jesus" -robvalue
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#9
RE: What's the most face-palm-worthy statement you have ever heard from a priest/preacher
Ooh, and remember Marguerite Perrin, the PSYCHO GOD WARRIOR?  Of course, she wasn't a preacher . . . 



"The family that prays together...is brainwashing their children."- Albert Einstein
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#10
RE: What's the most face-palm-worthy statement you have ever heard from a priest/preacher
(August 19, 2015 at 12:06 pm)Stimbo Wrote: I'd probably go with that pastor who got caught bragging about punching a kid in the chest for Jesus.

Yes, I remember that punching pastor. But that's rather on the barfworthy line.

I've seen a lot of stupid when being confronted by apologist statements, but as far as stupid goes, I think OP tops them all. It illustrates how closely fundamental ignorance is related to the Lord's word.
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