Truly Psychic...Not Ashamed.

[Athene]

You're going to lose something, but you'll find it. Just make sure the cops don't find it as well.

I also see a woman in your future.  You don't know her, yet. But you will at some point.
You will desire her...maybe.

Thank you. You are a true prophetess. I am forever in debt to you.

How may I be of service?

Do good. Keep an open mind. Send cash. Love others. Have patience.

[Athene]

What stock should I buy Monday morning?

Min, you need to invest in people.....I'm a great example.

[I_am_not_mafia]

Thena, do you have a range of merchandise available? I suddenly feel the need to buy books, CDs, posters, desktop calendars and a tea towel covered with pithy phrases.

[ignoramus]

I'm thinking of lots of reasons that psychics should be done for fraud. Can anyone read my mind?

I had a quick look in there Rob, All I saw was Selena Gomez naked!  Was I on the wrong channel or something!

[Athene]

Thena, do you have a range of merchandise available? I suddenly feel the need to buy books, CDs, posters, desktop calendars and a tea towel covered with pithy phrases.

It is important that you keep that urge. 
I will have some merchandise available in the future.
The proceeds will go to causes very close to my heart...unfortunately, I can't specify those causes.

[ignoramus]

Thena, do you have a range of merchandise available? I suddenly feel the need to buy books, CDs, posters, desktop calendars and a tea towel covered with pithy phrases.

It is important that you keep that urge. 
I will have some merchandise available in the future.
The proceeds will go to causes very close to my heart...unfortunately, I can't specify those causes.

We understand and respect your privacy...

But just give us a hint, eg: ...does it have the letter W, M , B  in it? (Not necessarily in that order...)

[Fake Messiah]

All psychics are frauds, except one who, if alive today, would be mega trillionare since he saw future so clearly that he would see lottery numbers. I'm talking of course about Aristonidis, the sixteenth-century count whose predictions continue to dazzle and perplex even the most skeptical. Typical examples are:

“Two nations will go to war, but only one will win.”
(Experts feel this probably refers to the Russo-Japanese war of 1904-05 — an astounding feat of prognostication, considering the fact it was made in 1540.)

“A man in Istanbul will have his hat blocked, and it will be ruined.”
(In 1860, Abu Hamid, Ottoman warrior, sent his cap out to be cleaned, and it came back with spots.)

“I see a great person, who one day will invent for mankind a garment to be worn over his trousers for protection while cooking. It will be called an ‘abron’ or ‘aprone.'”
(Aristonidis meant the apron, of course.)

“A leader will emerge in France. He will be very short and will cause great calamity.”
(This is a reference either to Napoleon or to Marcel Lumet, an eighteenth-century midget who instigated a plot to rub bearnaise sauce on Voltaire.)

“In the New World, there will be a place named California, and a man named Joseph Cotten will become famous.”
(No explanation necessary.)

[brewer]

Thena, you're pretty damn good at this. I know people round here that would pay upwards of $5 for your abilities.

 It's to late in the season now but how do you feel about taking your abilities on the road? We could get you set up in the county/state fair circuit next year. Put you in between the two headed calf exhibit and the any fried food stand.

You'll need to come up with a real catchy name. I don't have one in mind but maybe you or others do.

[Little lunch]

Do you do massage/readings?
In that order?
I might not have time for the reading if the massage goes overtime.

[Athene]

Do you do massage/readings?
In that order?
I might not have time for the reading if the massage goes overtime.

I am a psychic, sir. Not a misogynist.