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RE: Why I Am Anti-Theist
February 23, 2016 at 5:28 pm
(February 23, 2016 at 4:51 pm)God of Mr. Hanky Wrote: (February 23, 2016 at 4:20 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: I remember going to my da, who often described himself as a cliff-hanging Catholic ('we don't believe in God, but we do believe that Mary was his mother') and telling him that I didn't believe and I didn't want to attend Mass anymore. He very calmly and patiently explained that he didn't believe either, but still went to Mass every Sunday, and that I was risking breaking Mam's heart if I refused to go. He didn't threaten me (not that he ever did), but made his point. He wouldn't have me take the chance on hurting my mother.
I went to Mass until I left home.
Boru
I find that sort of emotional manipulation through drama disgusting. If your mother really cared rhat much about you, then she would have given up her selfish delusions of being the matriarch of an idyllic Xtian family. She may have thought of better ways to bond with her children, such as going for walks together on Sundays. My mother wasted one fine Xmas Eve for us last year at church when I traveled to visit her, and it was two hours I'll never get back!
What about your father, when you were ready to quit? Did he help her teach you the ideas which he didn't believe himself? Parents should not for any reason teach what they know are lies!
So you werent physically coerced into church attendence, although you weren't particularly willing when you went. Please be aware there is much coercion going on in other countries, particularly in the US.
There was no drama, and I didn't feel manipulated in any way, shape or form. I could have stopped going to Mass, but continuing to go was a small sacrifice on my part to not disappoint my mother.
You are in no position - and have no right - to criticize my parents.
Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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RE: Why I Am Anti-Theist
February 23, 2016 at 6:44 pm
(This post was last modified: February 23, 2016 at 6:46 pm by God of Mr. Hanky.)
I'm sorry, that wasn't particularly fair of me to presume your mother said anything at all, or that she even felt that way. She may not have said anything if you had decided to stop going to church, or even been really hurt by such a decision. It's plain that your father wanted to protect her delusions more than he wanted to protect your peace of mind, should you have decided to do what was best for you. Maybe it wasn't really her at all, and the wishes were really his own - I guess you would know if you talked to your mother about it.
You raised your parents example, and that triggered in me what i guess is a different scene, but it's all too typical in my country. What really, really stinks is that family values still revolve around the patronage of organizations which are truly less wholesome than a nght at the tittie-bar. This paradigm needs to be broken down.
Mr. Hanky loves you!
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RE: Why I Am Anti-Theist
February 23, 2016 at 6:49 pm
(February 23, 2016 at 6:44 pm)God of Mr. Hanky Wrote: I'm sorry, that wasn't particularly fair of me to presume your mother said anything at all, or that she even felt that way. She may not have said anything if you had decided to stop going to church, or even been really hurt by such a decision. It's plain that your father wanted to protect her delusions more than he wanted to protect your peace of mind, should you have decided to do what was best for you. Maybe it wasn't really her at all, and the wishes were really his own - I guess you would know if you talked to your mother about it.
You raised your parents example, and that triggered in me what i guess is a different scene, but it's all too typical in my country. What really, really stinks is that family values still revolve around the patronage of organizations which are truly less wholesome than a nght at the tittie-bar. This paradigm needs to be broken down.
I'm going to take that as an apology and accept it.
Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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RE: Why I Am Anti-Theist
February 23, 2016 at 6:55 pm
(This post was last modified: February 23, 2016 at 6:56 pm by Old Baby.
Edit Reason: correction
)
I also have not told my parents about my conversion to the "atheist religion" ... hahahahahahah, I'm funny.
The main reason is because I have no desire to hurt them, and I believe they would be heartbroken. Religion has a strong hold on them, just as it had on me for my childhood and entire adult life up to about 3 months ago. I actually feel a lot of compassion for Christians, having come out of that system. I understand how they think and how powerful the doctrinal paralysis is. I don't think they would cast me out if I told them, but I actually think that there's a better chance of me affecting them by not outright confessing this to them. Even so, they know something has changed with me. They might have even wondered if I still believe, but I don't think they'll entertain that notion. They don't ask me a lot of questions because they don't want to know. Meanwhile, I find opportunities to raise subjects and ask questions that makes them see and think about things differently than they have within the confines of the religious bubble. If I were to just tell them that I was an atheist, I think they would immediately take a defensive position in our dialogues instead of actually considering foreign ideas.
