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RE: I Walked Away From Christianity, but How do I Walk Away From My Family?
October 25, 2016 at 8:35 pm
(October 25, 2016 at 2:59 pm)Alasdair Ham Wrote: Just do whatever is best for you, Rhonda. Minimize toxicity and toxic people in your life. And there's nothing selfish about that. Because you've got a lot of warmth and goodness and kindly feeling to give to those who deserve it.
Hard to argue with that.
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
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RE: I Walked Away From Christianity, but How do I Walk Away From My Family?
October 26, 2016 at 10:39 am
Kinda hard to burn a bridge that's under water.
The god who allows children to be raped out of respect for the free will choice of the rapist, but punishes gay men for engaging in mutually consensual sex couldn't possibly be responsible for an intelligently designed universe.
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Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.
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RE: I Walked Away From Christianity, but How do I Walk Away From My Family?
October 26, 2016 at 6:25 pm
if you have to walk away from your family, religion is the least of the fucked up mess you call home.
anti-logical Fallacies of Ambiguity
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RE: I Walked Away From Christianity, but How do I Walk Away From My Family?
October 26, 2016 at 6:49 pm
(This post was last modified: October 26, 2016 at 6:51 pm by mlmooney89.)
My issue is just with my sister and isn't religion based but I understand your desire to keep them around because they are family despite their horrible treatment of you.
I have two little sisters and they are close in age and like each other. I am a good 5 and 6 years older and only close to the middle one. For the middle one's sake I tried for years to be civil but honestly I can't stand my youngest sister or how she treats everyone. She is an epic bitch and I'm the only one that calls her out on it so of course she hates me. Back in September was the last straw. She had a year to get her bridesmaid dress for my wedding and refused to, took no interest in being a part of any planning, ruined my bachelorette party, and had to be convinced to even show up the day of the wedding (of course as a guest not a bridesmaid after what she did) and I said fuck it. I'm done playing nice just because she is my sister and I feel like I have to like her. Now I can say I hate that bitch and avoid her at all cost. It has made my life a lot better. When I do have to see her for family functions we don't speak or say only what is absolutely necessary. The drama is down and family time is a lot less stressful.
I think in your case since it is your mom as well smile and say nothing is your best bet if you continue to see them often but I don't think you should feel obligated to see them often if it only brings you down. My godmother takes her role seriously but has finally gotten tired of trying to convert me. I'm sure that if you just sat there without saying a word and refused to talk when it was religious based eventually they would get bored. I would think if you gave them nothing to fight against they'd just be talking to themselves.
“What screws us up the most in life is the picture in our head of what it's supposed to be.”
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RE: I Walked Away From Christianity, but How do I Walk Away From My Family?
October 31, 2016 at 2:57 am
(This post was last modified: October 31, 2016 at 2:57 am by AceBoogie.)
to OP
None of us can make this decision for you. Not that you're necessarily looking for that.
I grew up in a family where there wasn't really any 'abuse' per se, but a lot of neglect and a lot of narcissistic emotional manipulation. A lot of, "You have to do this for me because I do so much for everyone in the family and no one ever helps me," type of stuff. A lot of bullshit that got really old as soon as I was grown enough to realize it for what it was,
I learned that family is not a right, it is a privilege. If being around your family causes you more harm than benefit... Maybe its time to cut that cord. I'm honestly not really close with anyone in my family, and you know what, that's okay with me.
I spent a lot of time saying, 'Yea family is super important to me,' because I thought you HAD to say that and you HAD to feel that way. Well you don't have to feel that way. You simply don't.
I hope you make whatever choice is best for you. Good luck.
Liife's too short to always spend your time with people who stress you out. Blood might be thicker than water but love is thicker than anything. Spend time with those that you love, not those that you tolerate because you think you have to.
“Love is the only bow on Life’s dark cloud. It is the morning and the evening star. It shines upon the babe, and sheds its radiance on the quiet tomb. It is the mother of art, inspirer of poet, patriot and philosopher.
It is the air and light of every heart – builder of every home, kindler of every fire on every hearth. It was the first to dream of immortality. It fills the world with melody – for music is the voice of love.
Love is the magician, the enchanter, that changes worthless things to Joy, and makes royal kings and queens of common clay. It is the perfume of that wondrous flower, the heart, and without that sacred passion, that divine swoon, we are less than beasts; but with it, earth is heaven, and we are gods.” - Robert. G. Ingersoll
