Prayer

[Cyberman]

It's when he talks back you need to worry.

[Catholic_Lady]

May i ask why it matters though? Not trying to be disrespectful or pick a fight. Just genuinely curious. I mean, if praying brings someone emotional peace, is therapeutic to them, and helps them get through tough times, why do some of you seem so irritated by them praying?

[Minimalist]

It's when people offer 'thoughts and prayers' instead of doing anything useful that it matters, C/L.

[vorlon13]

I've trained one of the cats to do a trick.

He feels good about doing it, and I don't even need to give him a kibble treat to do it anymore. If the cat persists doing it after my decease, and then gets any new cats that turn up here to do it . . .

See where I'm going with this ?

[Cyberman]

Personally, it's when they tell me they'll pray for me that I find insulting, depending on the context. See, it comes in several flavours. First, there's the standard kneejerk prayer offer for when there's nothing else to say; that's fine. "You'll be in my prayers for your tragedy" doesn't really hurt anyone. I find it personally ludicrous, and rather insulting if they're using my own circumstances as a proselytising platform, but if gives them comfort to say it then they can fill their boots.

Then we have the "let's all wish as hard as we can until we get whatever result we're trying to get", basically designed to make a person feel like they're achieving something or giving something back when really they haven't done a thing; like this I adapted from my FB wall:



A conscience salve. To which I ask, where is Madeleine McCann?

But then there's the "there's something wrong with you and your opinions that doesn't match up to my standards, so I'm going to make it obvious to you that you need fixing" flavour. That does leave a bad taste in the mouth, frankly.

The ultimate "I'll pray for you" comes when the person has lost whatever point they were trying to make and knows it, so throws it out like the Holy Handgrenade of Antioch; a sort of scorched-Earth "fuck you".

[Whateverist]

May i ask why it matters though? Not trying to be disrespectful or pick a fight. Just genuinely curious. I mean, if praying brings someone emotional peace, is therapeutic to them, and helps them get through tough times, why do some of you seem so irritated by them praying?

No harm in that at all.  In fact I sometimes sit in quiet expectation of an answer or inspiration which isn't already apparent.  If prayer makes that work better for folks, why not?  Do you think it matters where the 'answers' come from?

[robvalue]

I guess if someone literally can't do anything to help someone, then praying makes them feel better, as if they have done something. So it makes it easier to cope. I can understand the psychological benefit there. Of course you have to believe you're talking to someone. But you can achieve similar effects through relaxation, mediation etc.

As has been said, it's when something can be done but prayer is used instead that it becomes dangerous.

[Catholic_Lady]

Personally, it's when they tell me they'll pray for me that I find insulting, depending on the context. See, it comes in several flavours. First, there's the standard kneejerk prayer offer for when there's nothing else to say; that's fine. "You'll be in my prayers for your tragedy" doesn't really hurt anyone. I find it personally ludicrous, and rather insulting if they're using my own circumstances as a proselytising platform, but if gives them comfort to say it then they can fill their boots.

Then we have the "let's all wish as hard as we can until we get whatever result we're trying to get", basically designed to make a person feel like they're achieving something or giving something back when really they haven't done a thing; like this I adapted from my FB wall:



A conscience salve. To which I ask, where is Madeleine McCann?

But then there's the "there's something wrong with you and your opinions that doesn't match up to my standards, so I'm going to make it obvious to you that you need fixing" flavour. That does leave a bad taste in the mouth, frankly.

The ultimate "I'll pray for you" comes when the person has lost whatever point they were trying to make and knows it, so throws it out like the Holy Handgrenade of Antioch; a sort of scorched-Earth "fuck you".

I say that to someone only when I know they are Christian. But of course, if there is anything I can do for them, I do that as well. The 2 don't have to be mutually exclussive.

[ApeNotKillApe]

What annoys me is when people in a position to do something substitute prayer in place of something actually helpful. And it's not so much the self centred nature of it (glass houses 'n' all) but the arrogance, the dishonesty of not owning up to one's own indifference.

[Whateverist]

I'm more used to being told "I'll pray for you" in the same tone of voice as someone saying "I'll see you in hell". How did you turn out so well?