Why can't I leave?

[WinterHold]

I know it's my fault...but let's go deep and discover why I can't leave.

You don't want to leave, because western atheists are the perfect target for your inane attempts at preaching. Whereas among other muslims you're just another voice and if you tried preaching you could easily be checked and criticized by people more versed in the same bullsh*t you're slinging - over here you can be "the only gay in the village". Any criticism directed at you, you can chalk up to prejudice, or cultural ignorance, so you can avoid finding out and admitting to yourself how little your naive, mealy-mouthed platitudes and half-baked, pseudo-philosophical interpretations of barbarian poetry really are worth.

Also - you get to fantasize about converting some of the most damned people on Earth, however slim the chances of that may be. Surely - Allah would reward you handsomely, should you succeed. 

The most true comment I read in here, even though I hate your general direction.

Here, a Muslim preacher is kinda different because most preachers are Christian. Imagine a Jewish preacher:that would be quite similar.
Moreover; the majority of the forum are Europeans. Race plays a big role because many are bored and want something new. All races in the humankind are just like that.

In other Islamic-dominated places, his preaching is very very common, and his sect of Islam is very known. even my beliefs about the Hadith are well known and even preached for centuries:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quranism

Quranism (Arabic: القرآنية‎; al-Qur'āniyya) describes any form of Islam that accepts the Quran as revelation but rejects the religious authority, and/or authenticity of, the Hadith collections.

I grew up in a Sunni community, with Shiite communities scattered here and there around, so it's quite common for me to see "Mystic Knights".

Personally; I think it's a bidirectional benefit: athiests here would point to him as the example of Islam, they would point to me as the example of Islam also, and point to themselves as the example of illumination.

On the other hand, I get to preach, and he gets to preach too.

I think he knows it; and everybody knows about it.

It's a cycle of preaching to the preacher: "make two atheists become Muslim and get a dish washer for free; you can also shag non-Muslim girls, last but not least: all your sins are forgiven". Ask why Muslims live in the dark ages today.

By the end of the day, everybody gets a piece of what they want.

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To answer his OP: you can't leave because you didn't serve the purpose you're here for yet.

Don't let ideas about you being the "awaited messiah" or the "12th holy Imam" eat your head; IDK who's guilty in making you think that about yourself, or if it is just you who is guilty.... but don't let the "Madness of Greatness" lead you to the edge, it is a serious deal:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grand_Mosque_seizure