The Newly Departed thread: announcements (departures)

[Edwardo Piet]

Ha, that's funny Rob because I was just about to say that I'm leaving today too.

I'll still be around on Mafia but since I've discovered that I can't seem to resist posting my crap (and my often angry, frustrated crap lately) over the forums and... I don't like the person I'm becoming around here... I've decided that if people still want me around in Mafia... I'm sure my friends Poca and Mooney will be very understanding and nice enough to prompt me on Skype to let me know a Mafia game is on or has started. I'd rather simply not login unless it's to play Mafia.

Perhaps after I've finished the Mafia game I'll be modding myself I can play Mafia elsewhere. I don't know.

I don't know what it is but things just don't seem the same around here for me anymore. The atmosphere, I feel angry and bitter..... I don't feel myself (in a non-mayo way)... I feel like I'm very alone because I'm basically the only super-duper active poster around here now. And I'm certainly not very proud of a lot of the posts I'm making.

Losty and Rob both used to be super active too and I was very close to them... and now Rob has left and Losty doesn't post much. This place just isn't the same for me anymore.

I was always hoping things could be rekindled and the atmosphere of this place could be restored but I wanted to believe I could really pin down WHY this place didn't feel the same first.

It's lots of things. I don't know how to explain it. Everyone feels so distant and I feel like I'm alone in a crowd here. I really CAN'T pin it down but I need to finally learn how to understand things I can't explain. Or at least trust in things I can't explain.

I'm very close to Poca and Mooney but I'm close to them OUTSIDE AF as well.... I actually feel very lonely when I post here. Even Mafia is not the same for me anymore... it's fun enough to continue for now... especially because I do have friends there...

But I don't know. Things just aren't the same.

I'll be taking everyone off my ignore list too. I don't need that anymore. And I never needed it before. And it just isn't me. And I'll most likely be over at TTA trying to make some more friends and seeing what the atmosphere is like over there. And seeing if there are some people I can get along with that are also super active posters. A new community.

I'm not saying I'm NEVER coming back because I believe in 'never say never'...... but that just means I'm not saying it's impossible. I thought I was leaving forever when I left years ago and I ended up coming back and being pleasantly surprised that things had changed a lot for the better.

But for now let's leave it at never or I'll never be able to pull myself away at all and it will become more of a harmful addiction (and I'll probably end up getting banned or scrambling my password) than a place I stay posting at because I love it... like it used to be.

I know it may be silly of me to feel so alone on AF latelly... and to feel this way and not be able to explain it. But it's just the way it is.