Let's talk about the 'tyranny of happiness'

[Tonus]

Basically, the tyranny of happiness is the phenomenon of 'just be positive', 'think positively' etc. It's the extensively misguided mentality of 'if you stay positive, everything will turn out ok'.

The problem is that it is being stated as an absolute: "if you do A, you always get B." In other words, the premise is making a promise it can't keep.

My view of mental attitudes is that we lie to ourselves all the time. Most people do so in a negative fashion ("I just can't seem to..." "I'll never figure this out..." "Why are things always going wrong...") and few do so in a positive fashion. Either method means we are portraying ourselves in a way that is not accurate, but the person with the positive outlook is likely to be happier more often. This doesn't mean that thinking "I can do this" or "I know I'll accomplish this" will work every time. It just means you're more likely to attack things with a greater motivation to succeed AND you're less likely to quit when things don't pan out at first (or at second, third, etc).

I used to be a fairly negative person in the sense that I lacked confidence, and my statements to myself and others reflected that. Today I'm a more confident person and have high self-esteem, but things still go badly from time-to-time. The biggest difference is that in the past, whenever things went wrong I'd fall apart and spend far too much time wringing my hands before finally dragging my feet towards a solution. These days, I immediately start thinking of how to resolve bad situations and move quickly to take action with energy... even when I'd rather just fall apart and drag my feet. I'm definitely happier and things have gone very well over the past few years, but it would be folly to think that everything has turned out ok, or that it all will. I just know that I'm ready for those times when it doesn't, and that provides a sense of confidence and peace of mind.

(Note that most --or all-- of this goes out the window when we are talking about someone with a mental disease or disorder. Brain chemistry and psychological problems cannot be waved away with ignorant comments and a lack of sympathy and they cannot be fixed with a Tony Robbins video.)