Fair enough. My sum up still sums it up for me.
I just want what I say to be taken at face value so communication isn't fucked up.
Someone can honesty express that they view me in a way that I interpret as hurtful and I can honesty express that my interpretation of what they said hurts me. The fact that I'm hurt doesn't mean that they can't tell me things or that I'm childish or that they need to walk on eggshells. The fact that I'm outright telling them that they can tell me such things and I'm going to be honest about how I feel about it even if it's being honest about my being hurt means that they can tell me such things and it's emotionally healthy and adult rather than childish for me to honestly express such emotions and if they want me to be honest about my feelings to them then when I am it makes no sense to think that they can't be when I'm telling them they can just because they disapprove of the particular feeling I expressed.
I hope I explained it this time.
(October 27, 2016 at 2:08 pm)Alasdair Ham Wrote: That this:
(October 27, 2016 at 11:47 am)Alasdair Ham Wrote: And I can express my hurt without that meaning I don't want you to comment on. I absolutely do want honesty from you and you're getting honesty back. I am honestly hurt.
Was followed by this:
(October 27, 2016 at 11:54 am)Nymphadora Wrote: People are not going to walk around on eggshells to protect the feelings of others. You're in an adult world. You can either go around acting like a child who was just scolded or you can say "meh" and move on.
Just sums it up for me.
I just want what I say to be taken at face value so communication isn't fucked up.
Someone can honesty express that they view me in a way that I interpret as hurtful and I can honesty express that my interpretation of what they said hurts me. The fact that I'm hurt doesn't mean that they can't tell me things or that I'm childish or that they need to walk on eggshells. The fact that I'm outright telling them that they can tell me such things and I'm going to be honest about how I feel about it even if it's being honest about my being hurt means that they can tell me such things and it's emotionally healthy and adult rather than childish for me to honestly express such emotions and if they want me to be honest about my feelings to them then when I am it makes no sense to think that they can't be when I'm telling them they can just because they disapprove of the particular feeling I expressed.
I hope I explained it this time.