(July 16, 2014 at 9:08 am)pocaracas Wrote: Some parents fail to realize that children are future adults and turn them into some form of project and never leave childhood... becoming the present-day generation of 20 to 30-somethings which still think the world owes them everything, while all they do is pout.
I agree with just about everything you said, but wanted to clarify that the 5 minute comment was meant tongue in cheek. Like you I am not constantly in the same room with my grandson, but I also accept the risk understanding the trade-off of nurturing independence of a sort.
I laughed when you talked about 'things getting too quiet'; silent alarm of sorts. I translate this as the child knowing exactly what's considered acceptable and what's not. The game becomes more fun in a few years when they figure out making routine noise while being devious.
I always despised the 'raising children' idea. As you pointed out we raise future adults. That in mind, it's never too early to start developing critical thinking skills. I never accepted "I don't know" as an explanation for why the child's self described reason for behavior or desire.
Example. Recent dialogue after my grandson came crying claiming the cat scratched him on the forehead, which was obvious...
Me: Why did the cat scratch you?
Grandson: I don't know.
Me: You don't know or you don't want to tell me? I can't help keep it from happening again unless I know how it happened.
Grandson: I was just petting him and he scratched me for no reason.
Me: Were you just petting him or did you pick him up to pet him?
Grandson: I picked him up.
Me: Did he try to jump down?
Grandson: Yes.
Me: Did you let him go like we talked about?
Grandson: No. (while starting to sob again)
Me: So, why did the cat scratch you?
Grandson: I didn't let him go.
Following a nod and understanding hug...
Grandson: He won't scratch if I pick him up and pet him, but he will if I don't let him go when he wants?
Me: Yes, do I need to punish the cat for scratching you?
Grandson: No. I should have let him go. (pauses) Can I have an ice pop?
