The fact that you are so focused on how she says it shows how focused you are on interpreting advice as blame regardless of how it is phrased.
Someone could phrase something as a blaming way but you could still take it as common sense advice... which are different things...
What you seem to be doing is the opposite... someone gives common sense advice in a non-blaming way and you are treating it in a 'blaming' way and taking it badly.
The ideal of course would be for you to not take it as blaming when that isn't being done (as it isn't here) - when all is being said is the obvious fact that taking precautions reduces risk even though in either case it is obviously the rapist to blame!!
As if you (or anybody else) can really know anything for sure(!!) If you're going to make such a bold statement you'd not only require evidence but absolute proof IMO - since such bold assertion seems neither polite or full of any clarity whatsoever that would help in debate IMO
EvF
Someone could phrase something as a blaming way but you could still take it as common sense advice... which are different things...
What you seem to be doing is the opposite... someone gives common sense advice in a non-blaming way and you are treating it in a 'blaming' way and taking it badly.
The ideal of course would be for you to not take it as blaming when that isn't being done (as it isn't here) - when all is being said is the obvious fact that taking precautions reduces risk even though in either case it is obviously the rapist to blame!!
(July 11, 2010 at 4:32 pm)In This Mind Wrote: Wrong.
As if you (or anybody else) can really know anything for sure(!!) If you're going to make such a bold statement you'd not only require evidence but absolute proof IMO - since such bold assertion seems neither polite or full of any clarity whatsoever that would help in debate IMO
EvF