I dislike traditionalism

[MJ the Skeptical]

Ok, so me and fiancé are looking to get married in the next year or so (maybe).

I'm not wanting a religious ceremony or anything religious at all. In fact I'm not too bothered about getting married at all. I don't see why there's a big who-har about it as really it changes nothing for us a couple (I won't love her more or less with an expensive certificate).

Little bit of a rant I guess but her family is Catholic, and is expecting a catholic ceremony of some sorts. I've already turned down offers of financial assistance because that would give others leverage in the decision that we make. Indeed, I made the offer that they could contribute to the wedding if they really wanted to, but they can in no way influence what we do and where we do it.

My partner is of the same thoughts as me, and wants an entirely secular wedding as we don't have any religious beliefs and I don't want to contribute to an organisation that I disagree with (through money paid to the church).

Bah. Just a rant. It's annoying me because otherwise really nice people are now suddenly getting angry and disagreeing with our decisions because of their stupid traditionalist values of weddings and how they should be. Me? I just want a registry office, a quick signing of the certificate, and a fucking night long party in a marquee in a field on a warm summers evening.

But no, it has to be religious. I'm not starting off married life with a lie. I don't think her entire family know I'm atheist yet, which would probably make me go down in their estimation as some of them are quite devout.

Fuck that. I look forward to a day when society puts notions of 'you have to get married!' behind it. At least it's the state that authorises certificates now and not a religious organisation.

Does her family know she's atheist (I'm assuming she is) but if she isn't then I guess you have to spill the beans. If you want to just get married quickly there's no point is some stupid wedding that costs a bunch of money and doesn't show you love her any more or less without a big ceremony. I think a big reason why women like weddings is that it's a huge public showing of affection, mostly geared towards her wants and needs. If it doesn't matter to her though, just get hitched.