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Atheist Forums › Community › Religion v
So I Prayed Today...

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So I Prayed Today...
Faith No More Offline
Better living through chemistry
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#21
RE: So I Prayed Today...
November 27, 2012 at 1:17 pm
So, when can I expect Toilet God's face to show up on my toast?
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
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The Grand Nudger Offline
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#22
RE: So I Prayed Today...
November 27, 2012 at 1:27 pm (This post was last modified: November 27, 2012 at 1:28 pm by The Grand Nudger.)
Human beings see many strange and illusory things, why would we expect Toilet God to be associated with (or supported by) such well-understood human shortcomings? This would be beneath the Truth of His Toilet-y-ous-ess-ness.
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
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jonb Offline
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#23
RE: So I Prayed Today...
November 27, 2012 at 1:48 pm
[Image: bite_me_toilet_300.jpg]
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festive1 Offline
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#24
RE: So I Prayed Today...
November 27, 2012 at 1:52 pm
(November 27, 2012 at 1:48 pm)jonb Wrote: [Image: bite_me_toilet_300.jpg]

If my toilet looked like this, I would never be able to relieve myself again.
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Gambit Offline
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#25
RE: So I Prayed Today...
November 27, 2012 at 2:31 pm
Our toilet, who art in the bathroom
Hollow be thy bowl
I plant my bum
And when I'm done, I wipe
In a direction from 12 to 7
Give us this day, a roll that will stay
And forgive the finger that trespasses
As we forgive those, who use all the roll
And lead us to use the holder,
Delivering us from skidmarks
A stain.
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Faith No More Offline
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#26
RE: So I Prayed Today...
November 27, 2012 at 2:59 pm
(November 27, 2012 at 1:27 pm)Rhythm Wrote: Human beings see many strange and illusory things, why would we expect Toilet God to be associated with (or supported by) such well-understood human shortcomings? This would be beneath the Truth of His Toilet-y-ous-ess-ness.

Well, surely Toilet God can drop me a nugget of proof of his existence, yes?
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
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The Grand Nudger Offline
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#27
RE: So I Prayed Today...
November 27, 2012 at 3:03 pm
Why would the Toilet God be interested in such a thing, and why would you? He makes no commands, offers no reward for belief, no punishment for skepticism...and as we've already discussed, answers prayers regardless of who we address them to. But....if you absolutely need proof, Festive -did- get a parking space...remember.
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
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Minimalist Offline Donators
Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
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#28
RE: So I Prayed Today...
November 27, 2012 at 3:30 pm
[Image: funny-pictures-Stormtrooper-in-toilet-15.jpg]

The Force is with the goddess.
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jonb Offline
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#29
RE: So I Prayed Today...
November 27, 2012 at 4:13 pm
Tea anyone
[Image: $(KGrHqVHJDkE9BKrkJbPBPbfvICplQ~~60_35.JPG]
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HorribleOffensiveScouser91 Offline
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#30
RE: So I Prayed Today...
November 27, 2012 at 9:45 pm
Who needs A God when you can have numerous ones who specialise in different areas? We could have a God for everything...oh wait, the Greeks already did it. I find myself saying that sentence too much, ...damn Greeks
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Atheist Forums › Community › Religion v
So I Prayed Today...

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