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Atheist Forums › Discussion › Off Topic v
How do you get a girlfriend?

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How do you get a girlfriend?
popeyespappy Offline Donators
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#31
RE: How do you get a girlfriend?
March 2, 2014 at 4:43 pm
I'm surprised daddy hasn't picked a properly submissive one out for you yet.
Save a life. Adopt a greyhound.
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Assimilate Offline
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#32
RE: How do you get a girlfriend?
March 2, 2014 at 4:43 pm
(March 2, 2014 at 4:35 pm)ElleBelle Wrote:
(March 2, 2014 at 4:33 pm)Asimm Wrote: dark secrets are the best secrets.

By dark secrets I think he means actually no secrets at all.

You just like to ruin things.

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SteelCurtain Offline
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#33
RE: How do you get a girlfriend?
March 2, 2014 at 4:53 pm
The key is to let it come to you. There is no merit in "being" something you're not in order to get a girl. Believe me, that only works for the short term. You do have to put yourself out there in social situations, though. Go to parties, get togethers, school events, church events. Talk to girls. The only way to get better at it is to practice. Eventually it will be easy, and easy=confidence. Confidence is an attractive quality.
"There remain four irreducible objections to religious faith: that it wholly misrepresents the origins of man and the cosmos, that because of this original error it manages to combine the maximum servility with the maximum of solipsism, that it is both the result and the cause of dangerous sexual repression, and that it is ultimately grounded on wish-thinking." ~Christopher Hitchens, god is not Great

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Jacob(smooth) Offline Donators
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#34
RE: How do you get a girlfriend?
March 2, 2014 at 4:59 pm
(March 2, 2014 at 4:39 pm)ElleBelle Wrote:
(March 2, 2014 at 4:37 pm)Kayenneh Wrote: Or perhaps "yes dear", "no dear" and "of course you're right dear" is considered a secret.. Thinking

Nailed it.

Yes dear Angel

I could tell you but I'd have to kill you. There are rules.
"Peace is a lie, there is only passion.
Through passion, I gain strength.
Through strength, I gain power.
Through power, I gain victory.
Through victory, my chains are broken."
Sith code
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KUSA Offline
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#35
Re: RE: How do you get a girlfriend?
March 2, 2014 at 5:00 pm (This post was last modified: March 2, 2014 at 5:01 pm by KUSA.)
Here are a few ideas for a wife.

1) Find an attractive prisoner of war, bring her home, shave her head, trim her nails, and give her new clothes. Then she’s yours. (Deut. 21:11-13)
2) “Lay hold on” a virgin who is not betrothed to another man, and "know" her, but afterwards pay her father a sum of money. Then she’s yours. (Deut. 22:28-29)
3) Find a prostitute and marry her. (Hosea 1:1-3)
4) Find a man with seven daughters, and impress him by watering his flock.--Moses (Ex. 2:16-21)
5) Purchase a piece of property, and get a woman as part of the deal.--Boaz (Ruth 4:5-10)
6) Go to a party and hide. When the women come out to dance, grab one and carry her off to be your wife.--Benjaminites (Judges 21:19-25)
7) Have God create a wife for you while you sleep. Note: this will cost you a rib.--Adam (Gen. 2:19-24)
8 ) Agree to work seven years in exchange for a woman’s hand in marriage. Get tricked into marrying the wrong woman. Then work another seven years for the woman you wanted to marry in the first place. That’s right. Fourteen years of toil for a wife.--Jacob (Gen. 29:15-30)
9) Cut 200 foreskins off of your future father-in-law’s enemies and get his daughter for a wife.--David (1 Sam. 18:27)
10) Even if no one is out there, just wander around a bit and you’ll definitely find someone.--Cain (Gen. 4:16-17)
11) Become the emperor of a huge nation and hold a beauty contest.--Xerxes or Ahasuerus (Esther 2:3-4)
12) When you see someone you like, go home and tell your parents, “I have seen a woman; now get her for me.” If your parents question your decision, simply say, “Get her for me. She’s the one for me.”--Samson (Judges 14:1-3)
13) Kill any husband and take HIS wife. (Prepare to lose four sons though.)--David (2 Sam. 11)
14) Wait for your brother to die. Take his widow. (It’s not just a good idea, it’s the law!)--Onan and Boaz (Deut. or Lev., example in Ruth)
15) Don’t be so picky. Make up for quality with quantity.--Solomon (1 Kings 11:1-3)
16) A wife?--Paul (1st Corinthians, chapter 7)
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ElleBelle Offline
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#36
RE: How do you get a girlfriend?
March 2, 2014 at 5:03 pm
(March 2, 2014 at 4:59 pm)Jacob(smooth) Wrote:
(March 2, 2014 at 4:39 pm)ElleBelle Wrote: Nailed it.

Yes dear Angel

I could tell you but I'd have to kill you. There are rules.

I'm somehow doubting this.
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Jacob(smooth) Offline Donators
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#37
RE: How do you get a girlfriend?
March 2, 2014 at 5:09 pm
(March 2, 2014 at 5:03 pm)ElleBelle Wrote:
(March 2, 2014 at 4:59 pm)Jacob(smooth) Wrote: Yes dear Angel

I could tell you but I'd have to kill you. There are rules.

I'm somehow doubting this.

[Image: Mr-Burns-Saying-Excellent.gif]
"Peace is a lie, there is only passion.
Through passion, I gain strength.
Through strength, I gain power.
Through power, I gain victory.
Through victory, my chains are broken."
Sith code
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ElleBelle Offline
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#38
RE: How do you get a girlfriend?
March 2, 2014 at 5:11 pm
This thread is slowly sliding into "how to not get a girlfriend"
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The Valkyrie Offline
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#39
RE: How do you get a girlfriend?
March 2, 2014 at 5:13 pm
(March 2, 2014 at 5:09 pm)Jacob(smooth) Wrote:
(March 2, 2014 at 5:03 pm)ElleBelle Wrote: I'm somehow doubting this.

[Image: Mr-Burns-Saying-Excellent.gif]

Did you take the Hippocratic Oath?

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Dying to live, living to die.
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Jacob(smooth) Offline Donators
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#40
RE: How do you get a girlfriend?
March 2, 2014 at 5:16 pm (This post was last modified: March 2, 2014 at 5:17 pm by Jacob(smooth).)
(March 2, 2014 at 5:13 pm)Beccs Wrote:
(March 2, 2014 at 5:09 pm)Jacob(smooth) Wrote:


Did you take the Hippocratic Oath?

Tongue
Nope. I only took the page on feet Big Grin
[Image: 04b700f59ff957614bd43cf6f60f1fca.jpg]
"Peace is a lie, there is only passion.
Through passion, I gain strength.
Through strength, I gain power.
Through power, I gain victory.
Through victory, my chains are broken."
Sith code
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Atheist Forums › Discussion › Off Topic v
How do you get a girlfriend?

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