New here and need advice

[Kalyssat]

I have been an atheist for about 3 years. I was raised in west TX so I was completely surrounded by christianity. Only a few of my family members know that I am an atheist. I was wondering if any of you think that it is important to "come out" to your family, and if so why. I am very conflicted about telling my family and I'm not entirely sure why. I think it would really help me to hear other people talk about their experiences "coming out" or not.

[The Valkyrie]

I have been an atheist for about 3 years. I was raised in west TX so I was completely surrounded by christianity. Only a few of my family members know that I am an atheist. I was wondering if any of you think that it is important to "come out" to your family, and if so why. I am very conflicted about telling my family and I'm not entirely sure why. I think it would really help me to hear other people talk about their experiences "coming out" or not.

First up, welcome.

The response I have depends on your situation.

Your age, your circumstances, what negative effects will you suffer by doing so, etc.

[Bad Wolf]

It depends on how they are? How do you think they would react if you gave them this news? Also, how old are you? Are you still living with your parents? Are you dependent on them?

[Exian]

Kalyssat!

Everyone in my family are Christians, but because its basically in name and beliefs only (not actually practicing) I don't feel the need to tell them I'm an atheist. It works out just fine. If your family is practicing and taking you to church, that's a different story. If you're living under their roof, that's another different story. Let us know where you're at.

[Kalyssat]

I am 25, I just moved to PA (first time not living in TX, IT'S INCREDIBLE) and I am very close to my family. The only negative effects would be judgement, sadness, disappointment, etc… I have ALWAYS been a people pleaser, although that tendency has faded as I have grown up, it's still part of me. The weird thing is, if I remove myself from the situation, I know my family would still love and support me but I'm still scared/anxious. When my family members tell me that they will pray for me or to "trust in god", I cringe. I don't really feel guilty but it does feel a bit dishonest. Like I said, I am very close to my family but I also feel strongly about secularism. I can't really be active with my perspective as long as they think I am still a christian. I am stuck.

[Minimalist]

Hey, there.

It is always an "if-then" question.

"If" you tell them "then" how much shit are you likely to take because of it and are you prepared for it?

Or,

"If" you remain silent "then" can you continue to put up with the stress of being surrounded by ignorant jesus freaks?

Remember that in doing the math for these problems you can always come here and vent.

[The Valkyrie]

I am 25, I just moved to PA (first time not living in TX, IT'S INCREDIBLE) and I am very close to my family. The only negative effects would be judgement, sadness, disappointment, etc… I have ALWAYS been a people pleaser, although that tendency has faded as I have grown up, it's still part of me. The weird thing is, if I remove myself from the situation, I know my family would still love and support me but I'm still scared/anxious. When my family members tell me that they will pray for me or to "trust in god", I cringe. I don't really feel guilty but it does feel a bit dishonest. Like I said, I am very close to my family but I also feel strongly about secularism. I can't really be active with my perspective as long as they think I am still a christian. I am stuck.

In these circumstances I'd be open and honest.

Don't just announce it. Sit your family down, either directly or online, explain your reasoning and what you feel. Specify, also, that you're still the same good person they know with only a non belief in deities.

[ignoramus]

Isn't it sad that today in a first world country, you have to make a potentially life changing decision about "coming out" about your clarity of thinking over the deluded masses.... Pathetic really when you look at it in the cold light of day.

[JesusHChrist]

Isn't it sad that today in a first world country, you have to make a potentially life changing decision about "coming out" about your clarity of thinking over the deluded masses.... Pathetic really when you look at it in the cold light of day.

It's one of the ways the faith virus protects itself.

[Kalyssat]

It is sad... And shocking. I didn't realize how devastating it can be until I read through this forum. I had tears in my eyes because this is reality. There is a staggering level of desensitization that comes from the saturation of media that makes me feel naive when I read some of these posts. I don't know what the solution is but it's absolutely necessary for us to find one.