Your self in real life vs on AF

[Expired]

I think I'm just about the same or maybe a little more sociable on line.

[Brian37]

Good evening, heathenoids. 

The poll question is, "What are you like in real life, compared to how you are on these forums?" This is in reference of course, to how you talk to people.

Please feel free to explain your answer.

What is the point of this poll? I don't think it matters either way which direction someone goes. Even outside the web individuals will behave differently in different situations.

I am also no fan of anyone making blanket judgement as to why people get relegated to only having a computer to vent on. 

This applies to anyone world wide regardless of label. I was bullied as a kid. So if say a minority Muslim living under a majority Muslim, or say a Christian or atheist living under an oppressive majority, or even in a judgemental town or isolated local, even kids or teens who get forced to live in silence within their own household NO MATTER the label, sometimes that is all they have. I DO  have empathy for minorities depending on the situation they live in and where they live. 

It is not bullying in the west, if you are not forced to partake which nobody here is being forced to be here. Blasphemy is not bullying, cussing by itself also is not bullying. It only becomes bullying when it is repeated and the victim has no way out or any way to fight back.

Now, there is a huge difference between adults and teens. Adults in the west have more options to leave a situation than say kids still in school. I do think there should be better regulations available to schools and parents to prevent bullies online, because what they say online will go back to school in a place they are forced to be at. Now having said that, I also at the same time think parents also need to teach their kids not to bully at school, but also teach their kids sell confidence and that when they become adults, not everyone will only say nice things about them. 


I myself live in a very red state and also live in a very rural area so this really is my only contact with other atheists. The same can be said for any non majority in man locations of the Middle East and Asia.

[Joods]

I swear less online.

I do too, actually. But I think that's really just because I only swear when I'm talking to people I'm close with. I don't just blurt it out in front of anyone.

Lol. I have no filter. I lost that a long time ago when my give a damn busted. I am as abrasive IRL as I am online. People either like me or they don't and I don't really care. When others start paying my bills, I will give a shit about their opinions.

[pocaracas]

I'm about the same...
But, like Rob says, in real life, body language is an integral part of communication and that is totally absent online - except for a few smilies, but these are insufficient.

On the other hand, in real life there are engagements that one just doesn't go for, mostly due to the perception of lack of time... like the one Becca exemplified. If I'm walking somewhere and someone comes to me about god, I just tell them off.... I'm going somewhere and when I do that I just want to get there as fast as possible... it's bad enough that I have some traffic lights forcing me to stop for a minute or so.

Also, the power of google and all the information therein are absent in real life, so I cannot show the deluded how things are in reality... I can only tell them... and that carries as much weight as what the folk from other religions tell them := none. So.... why bother?

Bottom line, in real life, I keep it to myself.

[Brian37]

I do too, actually. But I think that's really just because I only swear when I'm talking to people I'm close with. I don't just blurt it out in front of anyone.

Lol. I have no filter. I lost that a long time ago when my give a damn busted. I am as abrasive IRL as I am online. People either like me or they don't and I don't really care. When others start paying my bills, I will give a shit about their opinions.

I am never an all or nothing person. I don't give a shit either, but context of situation matters. In the context of this forum nobody is forced to be here. But for minorities living under oppression or suspicion, it does matter. It also matters for kids in public schools whom cant leave.

It depends and is case by case, not all or nothing, not either or.

[Joods]

Lol. I have no filter. I lost that a long time ago when my give a damn busted. I am as abrasive IRL as I am online. People either like me or they don't and I don't really care. When others start paying my bills, I will give a shit about their opinions.

I am never an all or nothing person. I don't give a shit either, but context of situation matters. In the context of this forum nobody is forced to be here. But for minorities living under oppression or suspicion, it does matter. It also matters for kids in public schools whom cant leave.

It depends and is case by case, not all or nothing, not either or.

While I stand by what I said. Most of the time I do use tact and I am empathetic towards others. I'm not a bitch all the time. Just because I kept my post short, doesn't mean anyone should read more into it than what it was.

When you've walked in my personal shoes, then feel free to tell me about context of situations. And please don't presume to think that I am an all or nothing person or that I think things are only black or white. When it comes to RL situations, depending on what it is, depends on my reaction to it. Obviously. I do not like confrontation IRL. At all. I go out of my way to avoid it, but when someone backs me into a corner, I will stand up for myself and I will fight back.

I don't talk to very many people IRL because, thanks to my abusers, I have serious trust issues. I feel this is a safe place for me to come and vent because they don't know that I'm here and I can be more of myself.

[Brian37]

I am never an all or nothing person. I don't give a shit either, but context of situation matters. In the context of this forum nobody is forced to be here. But for minorities living under oppression or suspicion, it does matter. It also matters for kids in public schools whom cant leave.

It depends and is case by case, not all or nothing, not either or.

While I stand by what I said. Most of the time I do use tact and I am empathetic towards others. I'm not a bitch all the time. Just because I kept my post short, doesn't mean anyone should read more into it than what it was.

When you've walked in my personal shoes, then feel free to tell me about context of situations. And please don't presume to think that I am an all or nothing person or that I think things are only black or white. When it comes to RL situations, depending on what it is, depends on my reaction to it. Obviously. I do not like confrontation IRL. At all. I go out of my way to avoid it, but when someone backs me into a corner, I will stand up for myself and I will fight back.

I don't talk to very many people IRL because, thanks to my abusers, I have serious trust issues. I feel this is a safe place for me to come and vent because they don't know that I'm here and I can be more of myself.

And you have not walked in my shoes either. I was bullied as a kid and in high school, and I too still suffer from trust issues, so believe me I do understand. I was not presuming, I was merely adding to what you what you said for the benefit of the readers.

Yes when someone backs you into a corner, you have every right to fight back. I didn't have benefit of brothers or sisters or even one single friend on the street I grew up on. I didn't have my first friend until HS. I was adopted and it also didn't help that my adoptive parents had an authoritarian attitude and both were teachers raising a sensitive awkward pimple faced dork who didn't fit in.

[Joods]

My apologies Brian

[Brian37]

My apologies Brian

I could have made myself a little more clear too, so sorry for the misunderstanding on my part too.

I guess part of that is reacting over the years to fellow liberals who insist on taboos and or self entitled religious people who think not always getting what they want or getting offended is tyranny.

There is a huge difference between bullying, and getting offended. Bullying is when you cant leave. Merely getting offended when you can leave or respond back, is not bullying.

[*Deidre*]

I'm the same online and offline. But I wish I could hold up a sign with or something. That's the only drawback.