Theists teaching children

[Joods]

Odd thing is, his exwife is Wiccan also. Perhaps neither one of them know enough about their own faith to realize that they should be against what the school is doing? Remember, she allows them to go. She told me once that if the boys want to go and learn about god, that is fine with her. It's their decision.

They were 8 and 11 years old at the time this program started. They are now 11 and 14 years old. Way to let the christian religion indoctrinate your kids.

[Foxaèr]

Way to let the christian religion indoctrinate your kids.

Indeed.

They just seem like lazy parents to me, from what you have described. Do you feel as though you are the sole parent concerning the kids?

[Joods]

Yup. You hit the nail on the head. When they are with us, I am the parent who does activities with them. I take them places, I find free things for us to do during the summer. Last year, we had them the weekend after Mother's day and they both told me that I am more of a mom to them than their own mother.

When they have to ask something, even if Rob is in the room, they come directly to me and ask their question. K was outside on Friday and I was calling for him to come in as dinner was ready. One of the neighbor kids said "Hey K, you mom is looking for you" K didn't even correct the other kid. He was just like "okay, thanks!"

I think much of it has to do with the fact that in October 2014, the oldest (T) came and told him his mother hit him with a kitchen utensil because he got a D on his report card. He also said her boyfriend got within an inch of his face and started yelling at him. He said he was afraid to go with her back home on Sunday. This was Saturday at 1 in the morning. I called the police, after a long talk with T about his fears. We even called his mother's neighbor because she had told us Friday, on a text message that she needed to talk to us. We are friends with her and Rob's ex hates that.

Anyway, she told us that she could hear T screaming inside his mother's trailer, like he was being hit. There was also a lot of shouting going on. She came over that night and verified what she heard with the cop. He decided that after listening to T and the neighbor, that he was calling Childline. We told the cop that we had no intention of returning the boys to their mother Sunday evening and he suggested that after he call Childline, that we get down to the court house and file an application for a PFA. (Yes, the court house has a department that operates 24/7 just for PFA's, which are Protection From Abuse orders.)

Long story short, we ended up with the boys for an entire month while Rob and his ex went to court four separate times. The judge ended up denying his petition for an extended PFA and said that while she believes the mother is abusive, that PFA court is no place to seek custody.

I was floored. The kids testified, I testified, the neighbor testified, as did the cop and Rob, himself. We were all consistent in what we had to say. To this day, T still wants to come live with us. Sadly, he's his mother's scapegoat and gets yelled at for everything he does. We have no problems, behavioral or otherwise, with the kids. She's bi-polar and refuses to take meds for it so the kids are always walking around on eggshells with her. And that's still not good enough.

They are my kids, through and through. I didn't have to give birth to them in order for me to love them as much as I love my own daughters. My gut tells me that when they are adults, I'm the one they are going to visit, because I'm the only parent who really gives a shit.

[Foxaèr]

I wish I could feel your pain. However, I do understand what you are enduring due to similar situations I have experienced in life.

All I can state is that you need to find a way to get your man to man up.

[Joods]

I have threatened to leave, but then who is going to look out for these boys? I don't know what else I could possibly do to get him to step up. Like I said, we can't afford for him to take a day off, much less hire an attorney.

One good thing is that while the judge did return the boys to their mother, the judge also issued a different kind of order on the mother. It states that she is not allowed to use corporal punishment on the kids. She's not allowed to hit them or otherwise physically abuse or harm them. I have talked to both boys and they have always understood that if their mother so much as raises a hand to them, they are to come and tell me and their dad.

[Foxaèr]

All you can do is be there for those boys. They will know that you are a better mother to them than their actual mother.

You should never threaten to leave. That man is a good man, albeit a bit lame in the parenting department, but that is what you are for.

Let him know that. Take charge.

[Joods]

And I want to apologize for derailing your thread. That was not my intention to turn it into a venting thread for my personal issues.

[Foxaèr]

Oh, no worries. I am here to help in any capacity.

[Joods]

He's a wonderful guy and in many ways I'm lucky to have him.

[Joods]

I just wish that legally, I had some rights here.