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I need a therapist
#1
I need a therapist
I am so confused about what to do in life. I don't know if I should just end things with my wife. I don't know if I should continue with my religion just for the friends and the community. I don't know if I should try to go back to school and try to become a lawyer which has always been a dream of mine. I am 29 with a HS diploma and nothing else. My business is successful enough for a comfortable life. I am scared still that I am wrong about not believing in my religion anymore. And the list goes on. I feel like the inevitable is that I am just going to leave my wife and start over but I am scared that I'll be aimless and lonely. I know that there is plenty I can do in life to widen out and make new friends but I am so scared that I am making the wrong decision.

Does anyone recommend a good tool for finding a therapist? Anybody know of specific treatments that they recommend for me? Any other suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks
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#2
RE: I need a therapist
(August 22, 2016 at 3:27 pm)Won2blv Wrote: I am so confused about what to do in life. I don't know if I should just end things with my wife. I don't know if I should continue with my religion just for the friends and the community. I don't know if I should try to go back to school and try to become a lawyer which has always been a dream of mine. I am 29 with a HS diploma and nothing else. My business is successful enough for a comfortable life. I am scared still that I am wrong about not believing in my religion anymore. And the list goes on. I feel like the inevitable is that I am just going to leave my wife and start over but I am scared that I'll be aimless and lonely. I know that there is plenty I can do in life to widen out and make new friends but I am so scared that I am making the wrong decision.

Does anyone recommend a good tool for finding a therapist? Anybody know of specific treatments that they recommend for me? Any other suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks

Be true about your feelings with your wife, if your friends don't accept you then fuck em.

If you wanna be a lawyer do it.

Don't worry. Just remember your not the only one.
Just think it through a little bit more.

Don't take any medication for depression or anxiety it's not worth the side effects.

Reply
#3
RE: I need a therapist
(August 22, 2016 at 3:27 pm)Won2blv Wrote: I am so confused about what to do in life. I don't know if I should just end things with my wife. I don't know if I should continue with my religion just for the friends and the community. I don't know if I should try to go back to school and try to become a lawyer which has always been a dream of mine. I am 29 with a HS diploma and nothing else. My business is successful enough for a comfortable life. I am scared still that I am wrong about not believing in my religion anymore. And the list goes on. I feel like the inevitable is that I am just going to leave my wife and start over but I am scared that I'll be aimless and lonely. I know that there is plenty I can do in life to widen out and make new friends but I am so scared that I am making the wrong decision.

Does anyone recommend a good tool for finding a therapist? Anybody know of specific treatments that they recommend for me? Any other suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks

Nothing beats a personal recommendation from someone you know well and respect.
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#4
RE: I need a therapist
Do you have any kids?

If not, leave her. You're clearly not happy with her.

Don't become a lawyer unless you really want to. Sounds to me like you've got things figured out financially, so all you need to concern yourself with now is following dreams and fulfilling your passions.

You have my support man, even though I don't know you. I'm not sure what to say about the whole therapy thing. I've never trusted that to help me, but you never know. I, myself, think you can help yourself if you really want to.

Start fresh. Live your life.
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#5
RE: I need a therapist
(August 22, 2016 at 3:31 pm)ScienceAf Wrote:
(August 22, 2016 at 3:27 pm)Won2blv Wrote: I am so confused about what to do in life. I don't know if I should just end things with my wife. I don't know if I should continue with my religion just for the friends and the community. I don't know if I should try to go back to school and try to become a lawyer which has always been a dream of mine. I am 29 with a HS diploma and nothing else. My business is successful enough for a comfortable life. I am scared still that I am wrong about not believing in my religion anymore. And the list goes on. I feel like the inevitable is that I am just going to leave my wife and start over but I am scared that I'll be aimless and lonely. I know that there is plenty I can do in life to widen out and make new friends but I am so scared that I am making the wrong decision.

Does anyone recommend a good tool for finding a therapist? Anybody know of specific treatments that they recommend for me? Any other suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks

Be true about your feelings with your wife, if your friends don't accept you then fuck em.

If you wanna be a lawyer do it.

Don't worry. Just remember your not the only one.
Just think it through a little bit more.

Don't take any medication for depression or anxiety it's not worth the side effects.

That's not how it works. If he's depressed he should definitely take anti-depressants unless it's mild and can be overcome with CBT, mindfulness/meditation, exercise, and a healthy diet. Depression, anxiety and mental illnesses in general aren't as simple as saying fuck it, thinking it through a bit more and skipping anti-depressants. I'm not here to attack you personally, I'm just trying to avoid having not so good advice handed out.
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#6
RE: I need a therapist
(August 22, 2016 at 3:31 pm)ScienceAf Wrote: Don't take any medication for depression or anxiety it's not worth the side effects.

And you know this how???
I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem.
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#7
RE: I need a therapist
(August 22, 2016 at 3:34 pm)Whateverist Wrote:
(August 22, 2016 at 3:27 pm)Won2blv Wrote: I am so confused about what to do in life. I don't know if I should just end things with my wife. I don't know if I should continue with my religion just for the friends and the community. I don't know if I should try to go back to school and try to become a lawyer which has always been a dream of mine. I am 29 with a HS diploma and nothing else. My business is successful enough for a comfortable life. I am scared still that I am wrong about not believing in my religion anymore. And the list goes on. I feel like the inevitable is that I am just going to leave my wife and start over but I am scared that I'll be aimless and lonely. I know that there is plenty I can do in life to widen out and make new friends but I am so scared that I am making the wrong decision.

Does anyone recommend a good tool for finding a therapist? Anybody know of specific treatments that they recommend for me? Any other suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks

Nothing beats a personal recommendation from someone you know well and respect.

This.
I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem.
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#8
RE: I need a therapist
(August 22, 2016 at 3:53 pm)RozKek Wrote:
(August 22, 2016 at 3:31 pm)ScienceAf Wrote: Be true about your feelings with your wife, if your friends don't accept you then fuck em.

If you wanna be a lawyer do it.

Don't worry. Just remember your not the only one.
Just think it through a little bit more.

Don't take any medication for depression or anxiety it's not worth the side effects.

That's not how it works. If he's depressed he should definitely take anti-depressants unless it's mild and can be overcome with CBT, mindfulness/meditation, exercise, and a healthy diet. Depression, anxiety and mental illnesses in general aren't as simple as saying fuck it, thinking it through a bit more and skipping anti-depressants. I'm not here to attack you personally, I'm just trying to avoid having not so good advice handed out.

^^^ This. Depression isn't a personal failure. You wouldn't try to think through cancer treatment or forgo treatment for a life threatening illness because of a decreased libido.

As far as therapy goes, just try it. Find a therapist and take the leap. One of the best things about therapy is letting someone else in on it. It frees you.

Best of luck, man.
"There remain four irreducible objections to religious faith: that it wholly misrepresents the origins of man and the cosmos, that because of this original error it manages to combine the maximum servility with the maximum of solipsism, that it is both the result and the cause of dangerous sexual repression, and that it is ultimately grounded on wish-thinking." ~Christopher Hitchens, god is not Great

PM me your email address to join the Slack chat! I'll give you a taco(or five) if you join! --->There's an app and everything!<---
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#9
RE: I need a therapist
(August 22, 2016 at 3:27 pm)Won2blv Wrote: I am so confused about what to do in life. I don't know if I should just end things with my wife. I don't know if I should continue with my religion just for the friends and the community. I don't know if I should try to go back to school and try to become a lawyer which has always been a dream of mine. I am 29 with a HS diploma and nothing else. My business is successful enough for a comfortable life. I am scared still that I am wrong about not believing in my religion anymore. And the list goes on. I feel like the inevitable is that I am just going to leave my wife and start over but I am scared that I'll be aimless and lonely. I know that there is plenty I can do in life to widen out and make new friends but I am so scared that I am making the wrong decision.

Does anyone recommend a good tool for finding a therapist? Anybody know of specific treatments that they recommend for me? Any other suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks

Internet rando here, weighing in.  Not about your religion...because that;s unimportant compared to the wifey.  Are you not making each other happy anymore?  Have you both given it your level best and exhausted all the things that -might- make it better?  Does she even -know- that you're going through this? Be a lawyer regardless, do that shit, go back to school - hell doing that might actually improve your state of mind and thus the state of your relationship.  

If....-if-...it all goes south, bro...plenty of us have started over again and again.  I've worn so many hats that people sometimes don't even believe it's possible (hell, looking back, I wonder how I pulled it off...it's not like I'm all that good at anything in particular). You're gonna be aight, either way. It'll hurt like hell, and you might find yourself intimately acquainted with a fella named jack and his cousin jim......but there's light at the end of the tunnel.
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
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#10
RE: I need a therapist
(August 22, 2016 at 3:53 pm)RozKek Wrote:
(August 22, 2016 at 3:31 pm)ScienceAf Wrote: Be true about your feelings with your wife, if your friends don't accept you then fuck em.

If you wanna be a lawyer do it.

Don't worry. Just remember your not the only one.
Just think it through a little bit more.

Don't take any medication for depression or anxiety it's not worth the side effects.

That's not how it works. If he's depressed he should definitely take anti-depressants unless it's mild and can be overcome with CBT, mindfulness/meditation, exercise, and a healthy diet. Depression, anxiety and mental illnesses in general aren't as simple as saying fuck it, thinking it through a bit more and skipping anti-depressants. I'm not here to attack you personally, I'm just trying to avoid having not so good advice handed out.


I know depression personally. I wanted to kill myself many times. I didn't. I didn't want to kill myself for silly reasons like my xbox was taken away or some shit.

It was because I knew that as a brown person I would have to work twice as hard as the white man next to me,
I would be a minority for being atheist,
my dad's dying, etc.

And I'd recommend anti depressants but have you seen the side effects.

Take Valium for example.

Side effects:
Fainting
Dizziness
Thoughts of suicide,
Death, etc


Maybe some minor anti depressants would work but in reality they don't solve anything.

I thought this through because I knew that this man's life is in need of help.

I'm not gonna throw out advice that I haven't researched.

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