From what I've heard, Heaven sounds like a prison.

[Jax]

When the word "heaven" comes in my mind, I think of a place where it's free to do whatever you want and the good thing is, you can spend the entire of your life there when you die. But, then, yesterday I heard from someone heaven is somewhat a prison for people.

In heaven, you spend your whole entire afterlife worshipping god with your other Christian members, heaven has no sins, which means you will lose most of your personality. You do anything wrong just to piss your god off, you get kicked out and right down to hell. Everyone is a drone in heaven. You are to worship Jesus and God, no one else but them, not your wife, parents or children.

Sure, In hell it's eternal suffering, but hey, at least you get to keep your personality and you don't have to worry about breaking the simplest rule, because you're already in Hell.
And plus, in an atheist point of view, why would the devil punish us when we are the one who deny god, and the devil tried to overthrow god, so you never know what he might think about us,

Anyway, doesn't heaven sound like a prison?

[Minimalist]

Except that prison is real....

[Violet Lilly Blossom]

If heaven is a place on earth, which prison is it?

[Jax]

(14th March 2011 00:11)Aerzia Saerules Arktuos Wrote:  If heaven is a place on earth, which prison is it?

*Points to the sky*
Somewhere up there, or that's what I heard.

[Nitsuj]

Oh, don't worry. It SOUNDS like a prison, but it'll all work out when you get there.

Doesn't it always?

[Rhizomorph13]

Actually Hell is a non-stop party, although, you might not like Fridays...

One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. Walking around, he runs into the devil.
Devil: Why are you so sad?
Guy: Why do you think? I'm in hell.
Devil: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here. You a drinkin' man?
Guy: Sure, I love to drink.
Devil: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays, all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, Diet Tab. We drink until we throw up and then we drink some more.
Guy: Gee, that sounds great.
Devil: You a smoker?
Guy: You better believe it.
Devil: All right! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from around the world and smoke our friggin' lungs out. If you get cancer, it's okay -- you're already dead.
Guy: Golly!
Devil: I bet you like to gamble, too.
Guy: Yes, as a matter of fact I do.
Devil: Good, because Wednesday is gambling day. Craps, blackjack, horse races, you name it. You like to do drugs?
Guy: Yes, I love to do drugs. You don't mean...?
Devil: That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. Smoke a doobie the size of the Titanic. You can do all the drugs you want, and you'll never die -- you're already dead.
Guy: Neat! I never realized hell was such a happenin' place!
Devil: You gay?
Guy: No.
Devil: Oh, you're gonna hate Fridays.

[Jax]

(14th March 2011 02:20)Rhizomorph13 Wrote:  Actually Hell is a non-stop party, although, you might not like Fridays...

One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. Walking around, he runs into the devil.
Devil: Why are you so sad?
Guy: Why do you think? I'm in hell.
Devil: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here. You a drinkin' man?
Guy: Sure, I love to drink.
Devil: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays, all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, Diet Tab. We drink until we throw up and then we drink some more.
Guy: Gee, that sounds great.
Devil: You a smoker?
Guy: You better believe it.
Devil: All right! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from around the world and smoke our friggin' lungs out. If you get cancer, it's okay -- you're already dead.
Guy: Golly!
Devil: I bet you like to gamble, too.
Guy: Yes, as a matter of fact I do.
Devil: Good, because Wednesday is gambling day. Craps, blackjack, horse races, you name it. You like to do drugs?
Guy: Yes, I love to do drugs. You don't mean...?
Devil: That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. Smoke a doobie the size of the Titanic. You can do all the drugs you want, and you'll never die -- you're already dead.
Guy: Neat! I never realized hell was such a happenin' place!
Devil: You gay?
Guy: No.
Devil: Oh, you're gonna hate Fridays.

No wonder so many people say Thank God its Friday.

[Nitsuj]

I've heard that one before. But on the subject of hell jokes...


Bill Clinton dies and is on his way to Hell. At Hell's gates he meets Satan. Satan tells Clinton that Hell is full, but that Clinton will be replacing one of the current inhabitants, and he will be given the choice of who he will replace forever in Hell.

Three doors appear before Clinton. The first door opens. Behind it is Newt Gingrich. He's being forced to pound big rocks into little rocks. Upon seeing Newt in this predicament, Clinton cringes and says, "I feel his pain! I don't think so."

The second door opens. Behind it is Ted Kennedy. He is bobbing for automobile parts in a large pool of dirty water. Grimacing at the filthy scene, Clinton says, "Not for me."

The third door opens and behind it is Ken Starr. He's naked and bound hand and foot. Kneeling before him is Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best.

"I can handle that!" Clinton proclaims enthusiastically.

"Very well," says Satan. "Monica, you may go."

[Godschild]

(14th March 2011 00:01)Jax Wrote:  When the word "heaven" comes in my mind, I think of a place where it's free to do whatever you want and the good thing is, you can spend the entire of your life there when you die. But, then, yesterday I heard from someone heaven is somewhat a prison for people.

In heaven, you spend your whole entire afterlife worshipping god with your other Christian members, heaven has no sins, which means you will lose most of your personality. You do anything wrong just to piss your god off, you get kicked out and right down to hell. Everyone is a drone in heaven. You are to worship Jesus and God, no one else but them, not your wife, parents or children.

Sure, In hell it's eternal suffering, but hey, at least you get to keep your personality and you don't have to worry about breaking the simplest rule, because you're already in Hell.
And plus, in an atheist point of view, why would the devil punish us when we are the one who deny god, and the devil tried to overthrow god, so you never know what he might think about us,

Anyway, doesn't heaven sound like a prison?

Someone lied to you!

[Chuck]

(14th March 2011 00:04)Minimalist Wrote:  Except that prison is real....

The prison of brick and mortar is meant to imprison you after you actually get in. The prison of heaven is meant to imprison you even before you find out whether it exists or not.

---

(14th March 2011 03:02)Godschild Wrote:  Someone lied to you!

Yeah, like you.