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RE: Atheist Marriage?
July 5, 2011 at 5:21 am
Here in Holland you marry in city hall or have an official invited to your wedding reception. The marriage at church is not legally binding here in the Netherlands and just an additional ceremony you can opt in or out. Even religious people often opt out of the church wedding due to the costs involved.
Best regards,
Leo van Miert
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RE: Atheist Marriage?
July 5, 2011 at 7:11 am
Here such weddings can be and are held just about anywhere,from a beach,to a park to up in a balloon,with a civil celebrant.
Receptions can be as simple or as elaborate as any wedding.
Last year I attended two: The first was my nephew's. That was in the near country, under a large willow tree,next to a burbling stream. The reception (for 50) was at his parents' place,with his mum doing the catering,which was fabulous.
The second was my close friend's. His third marriage,her second. The service and catered reception were held at a stately old pile in a posh suburb,and cost them an arm and a leg.
Me? I was married in the school chapel of my wife's old school. Her parents were rabidly Catholic and very rich.What can I say? I'm pragmatic and greedy. It was worth the trouble when we came to buy our third house;huge interest- free loan.However, didn't help the marriage,about which the less said the better.
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RE: Atheist Marriage?
July 5, 2011 at 8:29 am
You can just get married in front of a judge if needed. Unfortunately for me, my wife's family is deeply Catholic and even though she is too, it probably would have been okay to get married outside of a church. We decided to get married in the Methodist church my parents took me to as a kid and that was hard enough for her family to swallow that it wasn't in a Catholic church. For that to happen I would have had to convert to Catholicism and that sure as hell wasn't happening. It was very painful to sit through a religious ceremony, but it was a compromise between the two of us because that's what marriage is.
If you don't want to have a religious ceremony though, I suggest you don't compromise just to please the family.
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
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RE: Atheist Marriage?
July 5, 2011 at 12:32 pm
(July 5, 2011 at 8:29 am)FaithNoMore Wrote: If you don't want to have a religious ceremony though, I suggest you don't compromise just to please the family.
Nor should you compromise to please your family. If they could manipulate you into religion, they could do it with anything. And if they do not respect their daughter, why would they respect their religious daughter either?
James. Heathen-at-large.
"Be ye not lost amongst Precept of Order." - Book of Uterus, 1:5, "Principia Discordia, or How I Found Goddess and What I Did to Her When I Found Her."
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RE: Atheist Marriage?
July 5, 2011 at 12:40 pm
Damn wiccans constantly exposing the more compassionate side of religious delusion.
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RE: Atheist Marriage?
July 5, 2011 at 2:12 pm
I got married at the local registry office.
I would have felt a hypocrite getting married in a church, but thats just just me.
I just looked forawrd to the honeymoon, a week in Paris. 1995 that was.
You can fix ignorance, you can't fix stupid.
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RE: Atheist Marriage?
July 5, 2011 at 2:15 pm
(This post was last modified: July 5, 2011 at 2:19 pm by Anymouse.)
(July 5, 2011 at 12:40 pm)Rhythm Wrote: Damn wiccans constantly exposing the more compassionate side of religious delusion.
Yup. If you harm none, do what you want. - Wiccan Rede.
Your tagline is all Greek to me.
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RE: Atheist Marriage?
July 5, 2011 at 7:56 pm
(July 5, 2011 at 2:12 pm)downbeatplumb Wrote: I got married at the local registry office.
I would have felt a hypocrite getting married in a church, but thats just just me.
I just looked forawrd to the honeymoon, a week in Paris. 1995 that was.
I got married in a ghost town. I too, would have felt like a hypocrite getting married in a church, which is why I objected to the State Law's language specifying a "Minister of the GOSPEL" being allowed to perform weddings.
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RE: Atheist Marriage?
July 5, 2011 at 8:07 pm
marriage is part of our culture, Its imbred into us through socialisation, books and movies, Because you don't believe in God It doesn't mean that you cant vow to be with each other. Just write your own vows.
I used to live in a room full of mirrors; all I could see was me. I take my spirit and I crash my mirrors, now the whole world is here for me to see.
Jimi Hendrix
I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not.
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RE: Atheist Marriage?
July 6, 2011 at 9:06 pm
Everyone's replies are really interesting  It seems to me like having a wedding outside a church can actually make it more unique! I really like the idea of writing your own vows, so I guess if I ever do meet someone and want to get married I'll keep all this in mind 
Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too?
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