Assumptions and Disappointments

[PhCritique]

@PhCritique

But who exactly researches a local place of worship before joining? 

Why would you NOT??

Boru

I'm the kind of person who should. You helped me laugh at this. I've been so critical about this, but where was all this when my 'journey' began?

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

@PhCritique


Why would you NOT??

Boru

I'm the kind of person who should. You helped me laugh at this. I've been so critical about this, but where was all this when my 'journey' began?

You do you, but I wouldn’t even join a book club without researching it first, let alone a church.

Boru

[Mister Agenda]

First of all, thank you for taking your time to read this. I want to get straight to the point. So, here goes. 

My experience with evangelists includes deceit from others and my own eagerness to find community. I wanted a group to socialize with and still want one. Without doing any research, I became a member of a local church. But who exactly researches a local place of worship before joining? Aren't religious people humble? That was my primary mistake.

I assumed the group's values and believed that being too critical would be rude. Many of us take leaps of faith when encountering a potential friend, but true friendships are very different from specific places of worship. Without any clue, I received warm welcomes from nice and warm people. They weren't threatening in the beginning of our association. 

Looking back is a blur now. Months in, I accepted communion or 'met the savior on the cross.' Some part of me actually wanted to experience what an early Catholic grade school failed to accomplish. But once again, I made an assumption - that being free from any belief system meant being 'outside' of the loop.  

An all loving god was the only thing I shared with the church. Verses were cherry picked from the bible. And over time, verses were reused with different interpretations. As discipleship began, I overlooked this. And my private readings of the bible and an increasing scrupulous side of me made everything stick. 

My desire for a social group was traded for loyalty. If I had a concern or a disagreement, it was kept to myself. There were no debates or thoughtful discussions. Our arms were raised and our palms faced the ceiling every Sunday. Anyone who spoke were free to interpret passages how they pleased. One particular person spoke in tongues while speaking. Eventually, I found videos of the 'flock' denouncing equal rights for LGBTQ. Although, the videos were from a few years back, I was embarrassed and frankly I felt ashamed. How could I knowingly associate myself with them? I started to wonder if there were any subtle ques of homophobia that were missed. But this made me more ashamed and very lost. 

Many of the people throughout my life encouraged me to respect the personal beliefs of others. If there's disagreement, the topic of discussion is changed or both parties calmly adjourn. Over time, I'm encouraged to recognize the intentions of others and to prevent additional awkward and disappointing situations. But disappointment is part of life. Right?

Feel free to add your stories or any thoughts.

Welcome PhCritique! Hope you like this community. If it was a churc-like community that attracted you, you might want to consder the Unitarian Universalists if you live in the USA. They don't have a creed (list of things you have to believe) and most of them respect the scientific endeavor. Some are pagans so YMMV. I'd recommend Ethical Culture but good luck finding one of those places.