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Alabamian Atheist in Need of Advice
#41
RE: Alabamian Atheist in Need of Advice
I'll bite…
Hello Celi's Parents!
It sounds like you have a very intelligent, passionate daughter. Congratulations on doing a good job nurturing those attributes. As a parent myself, I only hope that my children will grow up and demonstrate as much gumption and independence Big Grin
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#42
RE: Alabamian Atheist in Need of Advice
Welcome to the forum, Celi!
You remind me of myself.
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#43
RE: Alabamian Atheist in Need of Advice
I can sort of relate. I was raised Christian and practiced it for a long time, but I'm not sure I ever truly bought it. I know I wanted to buy it, and even tried to buy it, but deep down I'm quite positive that I always had doubts.

For that reason, I feel I can relate to your dilemma with your parents. I never expressed any of my doubts or concerns about Christianity or the bible growing up because I knew that, in the very least, my environment would be awkward after that.

I suspect you have greater fears than that, and that saddens me. Reluctantly, I have to agree with many of the members here who have adviced you to keep your real views private from your parents.

On a somewhat related note, I have a daughter your age, and my wife and I have raised her to believe whatever she feels is right. That said, having come from a Christian background and broke away, I've always known that she would share my views as long as I encouraged her to think critically and freely. She is, like myself, an Agnostic Athiest. As such, she often faces social pressures and consequences, with her peers telling her that she will "burn in hell" for her views. She's obviously not afraid of burining in hell, as there is no compelling evidence that any such place even exists. But it does bother her that her peers think such fate awaits her. It makes her feel somewhat alienated, even though she has many friends.

The point is, even if you could tell your parents how you really feel, I suspect, like my daughter, you'd have difficulty with some of your peers. With that, I don't see what it could hurt to at least wait high school out before coming out. High school has enough challenges without adding unnecessary social complications to the mix.

But, at some point, a person does have to be and represent who they really are. I don't think a person can find fulfillment and happiness otherwise. I know I couldn't find either of those things until I finally started being me.
[Image: earthp.jpg]
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#44
RE: Alabamian Atheist in Need of Advice
I realize that this is an extreme case of necromancy and I apologize. Over a year...wow. But I left this kinda unresolved.

Long story short: my parents kinda freaked out, then calmed down. They've pretty much let it go. My gender they're still not too happy with, but I'll be going off to college in a matter of months, and then they'll be able to do fuck all about it.

If any of you guys are still around, thanks so much for your help.
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#45
RE: Alabamian Atheist in Need of Advice
Glad it worked out for you.

BTW...this thread is an example of something that DID come back from the dead.

(Unlike fucking jesus.)
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#46
RE: Alabamian Atheist in Need of Advice
I'm glad you came out. Life's too short to be worrying about what everyone thinks about who you are and shit. Damn.
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#47
RE: Alabamian Atheist in Need of Advice
I'm glad too. I'm actually partly out as trans, too. Well, I don't exactly walk around in girl clothes, but all my friends know. I'm in the closet but the door is open. As atheist, everybody knows. I go to a high school in Alabama, I'm very openly atheist, and I've yet to get preached to, much less receive any kind of bullying or hate. Affirms your faith in humanity a bit, doesn't it?
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#48
RE: Alabamian Atheist in Need of Advice
(April 5, 2014 at 4:48 pm)Celi Wrote: I'm glad too. I'm actually partly out as trans, too. Well, I don't exactly walk around in girl clothes, but all my friends know. I'm in the closet but the door is open. As atheist, everybody knows. I go to a high school in Alabama, I'm very openly atheist, and I've yet to get preached to, much less receive any kind of bullying or hate. Affirms your faith in humanity a bit, doesn't it?
Well, trans is really difficult. I have a few trans friends and one trans ex-girlfriend. Unless you grow up in a really accepting household, you run the risk of losing your own family. And everyone you've ever known will try to resist recognizing your true gender.

I'm genderqueer, by the way.
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#49
RE: Alabamian Atheist in Need of Advice
Welcome! Love a good Whovian!
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#50
RE: Alabamian Atheist in Need of Advice
Yeah, that's true. I don't understand why it's so difficult, but then, neither do they.
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