Defiance

[Uvirith]

I hereby dare, challenge, and defy every deity, angel, devil, jinn, witch, god, spirit, wizard, demigod, demon, ghost, or any other form of supernatural being, to visit all manner of destruction and woe upon my head, singly or en masse, immediately, this hour, this day.

If they collectively fail to do so, they are nothing and unworthy of further consideration. I spit at God, I bitch-slap Satan, I ritually defile Allah and Mohammed, I ridicule Zeus, I scoff at Ahura-Mazda, I piss on Siva, I defecate on the face of Jesus, I defy Odin, I scorn the angels, I dismiss the devils, and I laugh at their frustrated impotence and the convoluted excuses of their foolish followers.

I demand that all the curses of the idiot wiccans, all the groveling prayers of the god-worshipers, all the absurd incantations of the devil-lovers, and all the laughable forces of karma, either put up or shut up--either destroy me now, today, or be declared powerless and non-existent forever.

Visit me with plagues, strike me with lightning, smite me if you dare, today, or you officially do not exist.

Well, that should just about take care of it.

[Demonaura]

I do something similar. I take my empty lighter (zippo) and say aloud (just in case): Compared to the miracles written in lore, lighting a simple wick is an easy task, an easy beleiver and soul saved. Most asuredly also an easy way to gain a follower with the power to change others minds. All you must do is light this wick.

Of course nothing has ever happened and if it did I'd smack my friend for being a smartalec and fueling my debate lighter.

[Eilonnwy]

Can I try and smite you with my amazing psychic powers. They're so amazing that in fact I'll kill you and bring you back and you won't even know it.