"Sins"?

[TheRocketSurgeon]

Hi everybody,


I'm new here and need your help right at the beginning, even though it might sound a bit strange to you . Some time ago, I left a VERY fundamentalist religious group in which I had been taught that we needed to ask God for forgiveness for each and every little sin we committed, even “guilty” THOUGHTS. As I was a member of that church for quite some time, this always-asking-for-forgiveness became like a pattern. Now I' don't believe in God anymore, but still I kind of feel the urge to ask for forgiveness after each and every little wrongdoing (and even if it's only things such as having an envious thought or driving 60 instead of 55mph.... So I wanted to know what you/”normal people without religion” are doing in situations like those? Just shrug your shoulders, tell yourself that nobody is perfect and go on with life without feeling guilty? I know it sounds stupid, but I'd be happy to hear your answers!!! Thanks in advance,
Sandra

Sandra,

Several have already answered you on this, but it's quite clear that "normal" (as in, non-sociopathic, non-malfunctioning) people evolved as a social species, and the concept of guilt and a desire to heal rifts within our tribes was a massive evolutionary advantage. It's good that you feel bad when you harm someone; that's what makes you good at being a human being! Indeed, I tend to base my evaluation of others on two factors: intellectual honesty (ability to face hard truths and change their minds when called for) and empathy for others. 

Religion, unfortunately, has learned over time how to hijack that brain architecture, like a virus latching onto your DNA, and imprints onto our "social programming" section an additional number of things to feel guilty about: "thought crimes". It then uses that sense of added guilt to badger and bludgeon you into compliance and conformity. This may even have had evolutionary advantages, in the sense that a group religion caused the tribe to have a cohesive identity and purpose, giving that tribe survival benefits over their less-organized rivals. Unfortunately, like many of our hunter-gatherer adaptations (such as our tendency to love sugar and store fat), this has become overblown and harmful in the modern world, with so many people crowded together and almost no humans living in tribes anymore. But to compensate for the trend, religion got better at the guilt-and-shame game.

This (along with a lot of other coding in the Christian faith "brain virus" that is self-defensive, like teaching us to doubt our own reason) makes deconversion difficult and often emotionally painful. Worse, preachers have learned to present atheists as immoral and/or amoral, meaning that if you (like 99% of people) are emotional and able to show empathy, you tend to think, "well I don't want to be an atheist, I'm a good  person!" 

In closing, I'll just leave you to ponder the words of one of my favorite sci-fi authors:

"Sin lies only in hurting other people unnecessarily. All other 'sins' are invented nonsense. (Hurting yourself is not sinful - just stupid.)" - Robert A. Heinlein.