Death

[athoughtfulman]

Grief is selfish? I must remember that next time I see a friend or family member mowed down by a passing bus hock:
Kyu

I wasn't "getting almost into Buddhism " but expressing a fundamental Buddhist (and Hindu) belief; that attachment causes suffering.

Grief isn't selfish? What is it then? Unselfish? What is it you mourn? NOT your loss? Be interested in an alternative rational explanation.

Nor do I accept that suffering enobles or that we necessarily learn anything positive from suffering.The most important lesson I've learned from suffering is to avoid it whenever I can.

So far my fear of dying has outweighed any suffering I've experienced,albeit not by much a couple of times.Should the situation change,I will leave.

Kyu I'm not suggesting for second that you should agree with my perception. I ask only that you disagree with civility.It was not my intention to offend you.

If you look at things like that, almost anything can be portrayed to be selfish. In the end, there is nothing humans can really do which does not at some point come back to their personal agenda. Even with 'selfless' acts. Why? Maybe the person wants to be known as selfish. The point is that once we start looking at grief as selfish, it becomes a negative emotion, which it shouldn't. Grief is natural. Wouldn't it seem a little strange to us if no one cared when someone died, even if it was their mum or dad?

Point taken, and from a point of view it's selfish, but I hardly feel like that's the right or the proper way to see it.

But can I just ask, have you never learnt a thing from suffering? Not one, tiny, itsy, bitsy lesson about something? And why does your fear of dying outweigh the suffering? The pain and suffering of dying? Or the nothingness?