Exactly Nymphadora! My childhood was pretty nasty too - - I prayed and prayed and prayed to be "perfect" and "holy" enough so that my Mother (who spent nearly all of her time praying, reading the bible, and listening to xtian radio) wouldn't have to "spank" me all the time. But geez, a kid will sometimes miss some dust, or not get a spoon perfectly clean. And not only did I never seem to get any help from Jesus, but my Father (who was sweet and brilliant and way too gentle) would only intervene when he knew my life was in danger. I went to a Christian school. I spent my entire life praying and studying the bible. I didn't dare to doubt or question.
And then as a teenager, I attended a church where folks were expected to stand up and bear "witness" during the service. I was part of groups that met beforehand to plan what they were going to "share". They made up stories before church, and by the end of church, they believed them. Anyone who couldn't speak in tongues was pitied. Well, I was pitied - because I begged the Holy Spirit to help me constantly, and it just never happened.
And I kept faithfully praying for another 30 years after that, and never . . . ever . . . had any sense that anyone was listening.
So yeah. Either gawd really plays favorites . . . or people just decide what they are going to believe and what they are going to tell the other people in their belief system. They need to make themselves feel special and have the other church members see them as "holy" and "blessed".
And then as a teenager, I attended a church where folks were expected to stand up and bear "witness" during the service. I was part of groups that met beforehand to plan what they were going to "share". They made up stories before church, and by the end of church, they believed them. Anyone who couldn't speak in tongues was pitied. Well, I was pitied - because I begged the Holy Spirit to help me constantly, and it just never happened.
And I kept faithfully praying for another 30 years after that, and never . . . ever . . . had any sense that anyone was listening.
So yeah. Either gawd really plays favorites . . . or people just decide what they are going to believe and what they are going to tell the other people in their belief system. They need to make themselves feel special and have the other church members see them as "holy" and "blessed".
"The family that prays together...is brainwashing their children."- Albert Einstein
