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I have arisen! Oh Glory!
#13
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory!
(June 3, 2016 at 1:00 pm)madog Wrote:
(June 3, 2016 at 9:44 am)YahwehIsTheWay Born Again Wrote:  
GLORY! 
Praise the Sweet Name of Jesus.

Hi, was thinking of joining your church .... I have shopped around for the one that lets me hate the most people and be superior to the biggest percentage of humanity, do you have a sales brochure I can read? Smile

Well, Sweet Jesus, I think you've just described EVERY religion out there. 

Why not also include in your search criteria "wants to believe impossible nonsense for no good reason and defend it against all reason."? That'll sure narrow it down. 

Sadly, I'm a True Christian ™ without a church. I'm not rich enough to get into Landover Baptist and all the rest don't take kindly to my correcting their limited understanding of the Bible. Lord, you should see the looks on their faces when I tell them that Jesus doesn't give a shit about the unborn. First of all, the Bible makes it clear that killing an unborn fetus gets you a fine, paid to her husband since you hit his wife and damaged his property. See Exodus, 21:22-25. Also, if your wife has been screwing around on you, the local priest can brew a magic potion that does a paternity test and then performs a magic abortion if the husband ain't the father. (Numbers chapter 5). And then they throw me out. Dumbass phony Christians.

(June 3, 2016 at 1:05 pm)Minimalist Wrote: You were gone for a lot more than 3 days this time.

Yeah, well, I'm not God and yet somehow not God at the same time.

(June 3, 2016 at 12:26 pm)LastPoet Wrote: Oh, hi DP. Glad to see you around. You still make youtube videos? Robvalue is making some lately. I have lost the habit of checking my youtube subs, my wife is expecting a girl, my daughter Big Grin

Congratulations and I'll check out Rob's videos. Do you have a link. I look forward to seeing what nonsense he has to say, using all that logic and all those facts. 

[out of character] Haven't made many lately. At some point, I'd like to remake my Jesus Timeline. That was, I think, my masterpiece.
"You don't need facts when you got Jesus." -Pastor Deacon Fred, Landover Baptist Church

™: True Christian is a Trademark of the Landover Baptist Church. I have no affiliation with this fine group of True Christians ™ because I can't afford their tithing requirements but would like to be. Maybe someday the Lord will bless me with enough riches that I am able to. 

And for the lovers of Poe, here's your winking smiley:  Wink
Reply



Messages In This Thread
I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by YahwehIsTheWay - June 3, 2016 at 9:44 am
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by LastPoet - June 3, 2016 at 12:26 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by LastPoet - June 3, 2016 at 12:35 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by YahwehIsTheWay - June 3, 2016 at 12:50 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by robvalue - June 3, 2016 at 12:36 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by LastPoet - June 3, 2016 at 12:40 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by robvalue - June 3, 2016 at 12:42 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by LastPoet - June 3, 2016 at 12:48 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by Joods - June 3, 2016 at 1:26 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by YahwehIsTheWay - June 3, 2016 at 1:40 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by YahwehIsTheWay - June 3, 2016 at 1:30 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by Edwardo Piet - June 3, 2016 at 11:16 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by madog - June 3, 2016 at 1:00 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by YahwehIsTheWay - June 3, 2016 at 1:21 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by Aoi Magi - June 3, 2016 at 1:03 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by Minimalist - June 3, 2016 at 1:05 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by Thumpalumpacus - June 3, 2016 at 1:16 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by Joods - June 3, 2016 at 1:29 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by Minimalist - June 3, 2016 at 1:31 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by YahwehIsTheWay - June 3, 2016 at 1:32 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by Joods - June 3, 2016 at 1:36 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by Minimalist - June 3, 2016 at 1:37 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by robvalue - June 3, 2016 at 1:41 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by Joods - June 3, 2016 at 1:42 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by brewer - June 3, 2016 at 1:55 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by robvalue - June 3, 2016 at 2:03 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by brewer - June 3, 2016 at 2:18 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by Minimalist - June 3, 2016 at 2:25 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by YahwehIsTheWay - June 3, 2016 at 2:12 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by robvalue - June 3, 2016 at 2:21 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by brewer - June 3, 2016 at 5:04 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by Alex K - June 3, 2016 at 5:05 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by Whateverist - June 3, 2016 at 5:12 pm
RE: I have arisen! Oh Glory! - by Minimalist - June 3, 2016 at 5:14 pm



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