You're both giving them way too much credit, I fear. These logical bastardisations aren't meant to prove the existence of any god, they're supposed to be tautological traps - the Fool's Mates of the apologist world.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
