RE: Being Upfront About Our Negative Traits
October 23, 2016 at 10:13 pm
(This post was last modified: October 23, 2016 at 10:15 pm by Whateverist.)
(October 23, 2016 at 9:38 pm)Astreja Wrote: I generally try to keep negative traits in the background, mainly because giving them airtime just tends to reinforce them instead of extinguishing them. If I can actually see something as a negative trait, then I take it as a personal challenge to get rid of it.
Yeah mine don't come out immediately but when I was pursuing a romantic relationship I made sure my challenges and issues were on the table as soon as reasonably possible. Part of what is good about a relationship is being known. I figure I've made the best deal in terms of who I am with I what I have to work with by now. Why set up unrealistic expectations? I don't do well with nagging so why set it up on purpose? I like to say I don't come with a channel tuner, what I am is what you get. At the same time I totally accept that my wife isn't in the world to be who I think she should be .. though it has been a struggle at times. I think I've made progress in becoming less judgmental.
