Is this homophobic?

[Regina]

Homophobia -is- bias and prejudice..that;s the definition of it.  Many homophobes, however, manage to contain themselves and not shit on your rights.  It's not about light or funny humor....and it;s only funny until people start throwing bricks, huh, lol?    

You might think it;s useful to cut some slack, but I don't see any reason to cut any slack on what people are and what accurately describes them..it's enough to say -"well, you may be a homophobe, but at least your not a fucking asshole. "  Honestly, thats the best you can expect from homophobes.  They don't really know why they feel the way they do and they're not in control of it.  They should, however, be aware of it - or they won;t know that there;s anything they need to not engage in in order to prevent shitting on you and your rights and throwing bricks.

You;re expressing, above, that you;d rather live in a society where homophobes liked you, so you're willing to be nice to homophobes.  They're never going to like you, Regina......no matter how well you keep yourself in your place...they're homophobes.

You have a very (no pun intented) black/white view of the world.

I'm going to tolerate just anything. I've made post after post after post after post after post on this forum, calling out people who I really consider to be anti-gay bigots, and I will continue to do that because that shit still affects me. I'm still a gay man, I'm still very annoyed and frustrated with people who go out of their way to bash people like me, and I'm still not going to be silent when I see real injustice towards gays.

At the same time, I have ability to look at the world and people with some damn nuance, and realise there are complex layers to this issue. There are people out there who simply don't understand homosexuality, because they grew up in a time and place where it was/is less accepted and more taboo. Yes, ultimately that comes from a place of homophobia. However, that doesn't mean that every person who simply doesn't understand gays is an absolute fucking monster, who is closed minded and unwilling to change their views. It also doesn't mean that a mere joke is on the same level as someone genuinely despising you.

Just a few short years ago, I'd say as recently as when I was a kid, it was still more taboo to be gay than it is now and there was still majority opposition to gay marriage. I can guarantee some of these people on this very forum, who are the loudest supporters of gay people now, were probably ignorant of it when they were younger. My Dad was one of those people, he didn't necessarily "get" gays, but when I came out? He tried so hard with me and changed his views, and that means far more to me than someone who gets on their moral high horse because they "got there first" with accepting gays. It shouldn't be a competition of who can be the most morally virtious.