Next on the soap opera that is my life, "As The Dumbass Turns" <---- Spoof of the old Carol Burnette show skit "As The Stomach Turns".
Last episode, "Brian sends riding mower back to be fixed for the SECOND TIME".
Deep voice announcer voice, dramatic music playing in background, "Brian receives call from lawn mower mechanic."
Mechanic, " I ....... I .... I don't know how to tell you this......."
Me, " Just give it to me straight doc"
Mechanic, " We fixed it, it will live, but we almost lost it."
Me, " What, what happened?"
Mechanic, "You bent the fuck out of the blades."
Me, " DAMN IT, what do you mean I cant use it like an earth drill like the ones that dig the tunnels that make the subways?"
END...... (Actual riding mowers were hurt during the usage by Brian37)
TUNE IN TOMORROW ...... Announcer voice, " Will Brian37 avoid doing the same stupid shit? Will Timmy get the liver transplant? Will Sarah realize her boss is a fucking dick? Tune in tomorrow for the next episode of AS THE DUMBASS TURNS!"
Translation for all the silliness above. I bent the fuck out of my riding mower blades running over tree stubs.
Last episode, "Brian sends riding mower back to be fixed for the SECOND TIME".
Deep voice announcer voice, dramatic music playing in background, "Brian receives call from lawn mower mechanic."
Mechanic, " I ....... I .... I don't know how to tell you this......."
Me, " Just give it to me straight doc"
Mechanic, " We fixed it, it will live, but we almost lost it."
Me, " What, what happened?"
Mechanic, "You bent the fuck out of the blades."
Me, " DAMN IT, what do you mean I cant use it like an earth drill like the ones that dig the tunnels that make the subways?"
END...... (Actual riding mowers were hurt during the usage by Brian37)
TUNE IN TOMORROW ...... Announcer voice, " Will Brian37 avoid doing the same stupid shit? Will Timmy get the liver transplant? Will Sarah realize her boss is a fucking dick? Tune in tomorrow for the next episode of AS THE DUMBASS TURNS!"
Translation for all the silliness above. I bent the fuck out of my riding mower blades running over tree stubs.
