@ Yonadav
"I know people who don't seem to have any neurotic tendencies at all."
'don't seem to' can be very different than reality , in my experience.
Over the years I've met several families who seemed happy and very well adjusted. That's because families are good at hiding secrets. After getting to know those families a lot better, I discovered the normalcy was a mask Their families were just as screwed up as mine. Selfish of me, but that was always a relief.
My now ex wife and I kept the facade of a happily married couple.We weren't. Everyone who knew us was deeply shocked when we separated. That experience taught me that the only people who really know a marriage are the two participants. And that there are almost always two sides to reasons for marriage failure. (although the balance may be very uneven)
Since that time I have never taken sides when this happens to someone I know. I offer support, but not judgement, to either side.
"I know people who don't seem to have any neurotic tendencies at all."
'don't seem to' can be very different than reality , in my experience.
Over the years I've met several families who seemed happy and very well adjusted. That's because families are good at hiding secrets. After getting to know those families a lot better, I discovered the normalcy was a mask Their families were just as screwed up as mine. Selfish of me, but that was always a relief.
My now ex wife and I kept the facade of a happily married couple.We weren't. Everyone who knew us was deeply shocked when we separated. That experience taught me that the only people who really know a marriage are the two participants. And that there are almost always two sides to reasons for marriage failure. (although the balance may be very uneven)
Since that time I have never taken sides when this happens to someone I know. I offer support, but not judgement, to either side.
