Gaetzgate

[Rev. Rye]

Anyone else get the feeling that his lawyer is constantly resisting the urge to grab Gaetz by the throat, shake him like a rag doll and scream, ‘WHAT PART OF “SHUT THE FUCK UP” isn’t getting through to you?!’

Boru

Once again, I’m a fan of channels like Jim Can’t Swim and Matt Orchard, who specialize in interrogation analysis. And one of the big underlying themes running throughout their videos is what to do if the police suspect you of anything. Say only three things:

• ”If you suspect me of anything, I will say nothing until I get a lawyer.”
  
• ”I refuse to answer on Fifth Amendment (or whatever your country’s equivalent is) grounds.” once you actually get your lawyer.
  
• ”Not Guilty, your Honour.”

Feel free to change the wording on the first two as long as it doesn’t soften the overall meaning. Literally anything else can and will hurt your case. There’s a reason American cops tell the people they arrest “You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.” Because it’s a simple fact.