God's law or private law?

[arewethereyet]

they should begin hating themselves a little bit. There has to be some sort of self-critisism inside every man and woman in this world. (what are you even talking about?)

Years ago I read a long philosophical novel by Iris Murdoch -- a splendid writer who deserves to be much better known.

Near the end of the book, after many events and much discussion, one of the characters says, "We should live quietly and learn to hate ourselves." (This was spoken by a character, not by Murdoch herself, so it isn't necessarily the view of the author. Nonetheless the character was presented as a reasonable person, which meant that her words were not to be taken as insane.)

Naturally this seemed very strange to me. As a young American I had been raised to think that loving yourself was always best, that the schools are there largely to foster "self-esteem," and the best way to go through life is to forgive yourself as quickly and thoroughly as possible. For example, "Of course I shot all those kids at the school, but I'm not really a bad guy." 

It's taken me a long time to ponder the wisdom of giving up self-love. There are Buddhist approaches, but also (as always) Western sources which parallel the Eastern wisdom.

Always to the extreme when you can bash Americans.  

What good does self-hate do in your esteemed opinion? 

You read a book.  The author said a thing.  You internalized it.  Imagine that.  Is there no middle ground?  Like self governance that is between hating yourself and loving yourself.