Paraprosdokian Sentences

[Rayaan]

These are some of the entries to a Washington Post competition asking for a two-line rhyme with the most romantic first line and the least romantic second line.

I thought of this right after seeing this thread. So, here they are.

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My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe "go to hell."
___________

Oh loving beauty you float with grace,
If only you could hide your face.
___________

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not.
___________

I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is, I met your brother.
___________

I want to feel your sweet embrace,
But don’t take that paper bag off of your face.
___________

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes -
Damn, I’m good at telling lies!
___________

I see your face when I am dreaming.
That’s why I always wake up screaming.
___________

My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way.
___________

What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.
___________

Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl’s empty and so is your head.
___________

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life.