FallentoReason Wrote:Let's try and analyse the situation in its purest form. From experience on this forum, talking about individuals that I know but that you guys don't know is very hard.. in other words there's more to it than what I said in the OP. So I guess the thing I want to discuss is us being an influence that could potentially change the course of someone's life.
I do realize that the stituation is more complex than you are able to convey. I do, however, think you need to reflect on your own wording here, because ultimately all you can be is an influence. You wouldn't be forcing him to do anything; You would simply be sharing what you have discovered.
FallentoReason Wrote:I can only speak from personal experience, and I told him this, that when I woke up that day and realised I didn't believe anymore it was initially thrilling because it was a whole new sensation that I've never felt before--being freed of those shackles that defined my life. Now I think I'm haunted by the implications of what I believe to be the truth, that we are just a phenomena in this empty universe and will die. I know that we can find meaning for ourselves but it's not the same as waking up everyday thinking that you're going to meet your maker and live forever. Whether true or not, that is something that I believe is rooted deep within us which is the instinct to want to survive. Believers have essentially 'figured out' how to avoid eternal death, whether true or not. That is what they believe hands down and ultimately I think taking that away from someone is just as bad as physically harming them...
It sounds as if your reluctance to speak to your friend has a lot to do with your own stuggles after deconversion, but one thing to remember is that you have only recently deconverted. Relgion isn't something you can go your whole life relying on and suddenly just be fine when you stop believing in it. It takes time to rediscover the beauty of this life on your own.
I think Kichi made a good point, however, that your friend may very well be looking to change your beliefs. I'm sure you could determine whether it his or your belifs he is concerned with just by asking a few questions and listening to his responses.
As far as the ethical considerations of influencing someone's beliefs, I think as long as you don't peddle your beliefs to someone else as truth, it is fine to tell them what you believe even if you fear it will influence them. If your friend is sincere in his endeavor and truly values your take on Christianity, simply let him know that what you are telling him is the conclusion you have reached, and tell him that he must himself weigh the information to come to his own conclusion. If you're worried about presenting facts about the gospels and the contruction of the bible, I don't think you should be. Ultimately, only he can decide whether he finds your information credible or not, and if he really wants to cling to his beliefs, he will.
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
