Fleecing the Christians

[Dotard]

I just need some good product ideas.

Had this idea long ago. Just no capital to start fleecing the gullible.

Idea:

Go get a cheap-ass wooden cross from your local cheap-ass cross dealer for about $10. Make certain it has a tag or title plate affixed to it that says "Cross of Calvary".

Then take it home and smash it into 1000(s) of little pieces. Get a boatload of tiny test tubes with stoppers. Place one sliver of the smashed cross into each tube.

ACTUAL PIECE OF THE CROSS OF CALVERY!! LIMITED SUPPLY! ACT NOW! Comes with a certificate of authenticity. (print some up on the home computer) Only $19.95 each!

You won't be lying. Each sliver is an actual piece of the cross of calvary and your certificate states the sliver came from the cross of calvery. Make the certificate all pretty and fancy-shmancy.

Advertise in the stupid people "news"papers like the Enquirer, the Sun, etc.
In the ad make sure to "talk it up". Just think of owning this reminder of God's unlimited Love. When Jesus died on this cross it was for you, blah blah blah blah. Appeal to that emotion.

For added fun put "For every order $1 will be donated to further the work of the Lord funding missionaries" or something like that. Just make sure you do the old lady in the missionary position and give her $1 so you won't be lying and you can keep your morality respectable.