Embarrassed to say that I actually believed this guy when I was 13: Alex Chiu. Luckily, I grew out of that phase around the same time I grew out of Christianity.
"Immortality Rings," God, what was I thinking?
...
"God," God, what was I thinking?
"Immortality Rings," God, what was I thinking?
...
"God," God, what was I thinking?