Forgive Me For My Fury

[LivingNumbers6.626]

Man, I don't know why, but I am feeling incredibly guilty over my denouncement of religion almost a year ago and the six months of interpersonal relation disorder afterwards. Not because I wish I hadn't but because of the way I treated those around me.

I wish I was better tempered. I had so much hostility and said so many harsh things to religious family and friends alike. Sure, my opposition had sometimes started the hostility first. Sure I had said sorry about most of my trespasses. And sure, most of them proved to be terrible people and being young I found it difficult to not get emotionally blind.

But really...I wish I had been a better man. Atleast to my parents. Wish I had been more passive. Wish I had ice for my boiling blood.

Anyone said terrible things to friends and family upon coming out as atheist?

I didn't, no. And I won't be rude to anyone unless they've driven me to that point with their own rudeness.

Have you apologized to those you feel you might have offended?

Absolutely. I was actually in the mental hospital when I apologized to my dad. My mother expects me to apologize for my opinions but I wont. Instead we had a lengthy chat on how the old testament is rubbish, how mormon's are the black sheep of christianity, and how I don't mind their religion till in turns into a political agenda. It was a good conversation. One where both sides adequately listened and spoke.

Now we don't even talk about the issue. For the most part, I'm trying to shy away from all religious garble. I know I can't avoid it because it's my family, but I can avoid getting into gospel talk and refutation.

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Well, to make things short: after health and financial disaster, I moved in with my parents 5 weeks ago. So they treat me well. I don't think there is any resentment. There is probably incredible judgement, but what family doesnt have that?

That sounds great for a mormon family. I've heard far worse from other mormons leaving their church.

As for me, I never had any problems. I didn't make a great deal about it either. See, where I'm coming from it's highly unusual to talk about religion anyway. My parents were religious in a sense, but were mostly attracted by the community their church offered. I can't remember, even as a child, to have once had some kind of religious talk.

Yes, I am pretty lucky. There was some pretty bad times, times where I thought I was pretty much disowned. Luckily, my parents are more rational. My father even has disdain for a lot of his mother's (my grandmother) religious garble. He is an educator, with a bit of a science background, and a good understanding of history. One time my grandmother basically blamed my failing marriage and mental health issues on my godlessness. My father stayed quiet but let out this "oh my god, here we go again" type of sound. Haha.

If I wasn't a wee bit looney I am sure things would be worse.

So did you come from a mormon background?