A rant on gender stereotypes

[Jenny A]

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The other day I talked with my parents and my brother. My eldest brother is 23 now, and I'm 27, and I began thinking after talking to him.

Most of the time I don't think about gender stereotypes. I'm aware of them, I have always been, but since I am a student I don't have much time to dwell on them and most of the time it's just to say fuck it. But talking to him I did think on it. I am a woman. I can fix wiring in my home, do maintanence on my car including brakes belts and wiring, I do carpentry, I work making and testing concrete, I am a student of engineering. Add to this I can neither cook not sew. I am horrid at cleaning, wear work boots and jeans stained with concrete and grease (nice clothes are not compatible with cranes and concrete mixers :p ). Almost all female stereotypes I scorn. My brother is a music major. He is an excellent cook, and a good musician. He is stylish, and takes great pride in his suits. He can knit. And he is inept with any physical task. He can't even change a tire. He doesn't play sports, he has disdain for them, despite the fact that he is tall and very strong. He is also aware of the gender stereotypes, but I don't know what he thinks of them, except that he laughs at a number of them.

Both of is receive some trouble from these. For my brother in his chosen profession it only amounts to a little mocking. But in myself, I don't like it. I've never liked it. When I was a young girl growing up I beat up any boy who spoke them to me. By genetic accident I am, and was, bigger and stronger than most of them (I'm 5'9", and fairly strong and well muscled). As an adult it varies from glances at me I'm not supposed to notice to having to fight against preferential treatment given to my male classmates. I don't like people who look at me like I'm broken, or that I'm abnormal. Simply because I won't plaster my face with powders and I don't dress or act like they think I should.

But why? Why do these stereotypes exist and wha purpose do they serve (other than to irritate)? I know that men don't all hate or oppress women, but they are aware of those stereotypes as well as I am. Even those men who are my friends and acquaintances still see me as somewhat odd.

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I am not just schizophrenic about gender stereo types, I'm of about 13 minds about them.

I am the family, carpenter, plumber, electrician, and occasionally roofer. I like those chores and my husband doesn't. Sometimes I need help, usually just another pair of hands and he helps. But those aren't his favorite kinds of work.

But then I also decided to stay home with the kids and cook (which I like) and clean which I don't like so much.

I have been the bread winner in the past and had something amounting to a househusband.

I think there are sexual differences beyond strength, plumbing, soft bumps, and procreation equipment. It's just that those differences aren't as cut and dried as the difference between a penis and a vagina. Whether it's verbal skills, strength, pain tolerance, mathematical ability, etc. the genders appear to differ, but it's two bell curves offset, not a chasm between two bell curves. There's always more people in the overlap between the two curves than at the tail ends.

I like men, and the difference is more than that protrusion between the legs. . .