Jesús is a Jerk

[Eilonnwy]

http://www.jesusisajerk.com/

I thought this would amuse you all.

This guy made a website to complain about a guy named Jesús (Notice the accent, it's pronounced "hey-zeus" and not "jee-zus") who had an affair with his wife. Apparently he keeps getting hate mail from Christians thinking he's talking about Jesus. His explanation is rather funny:

Here are the main points of what I'm saying in a nutshell:

* Jesús and Jesus are two different people.
* I was mad at Jesús because it looked like he was going above and beyond the call of duty with my wife.
* I'm not mad at your Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, who, if he exists, I'm sure is a nice guy that would never bone another guy's wife.
* Even though Jesús wasn't doing the nasty on my property, I still wouldn't cry if the Romans crucified him.

We all clear now?

Other gems from the FAQ:

Why do you think Jesus is a jerk?
I don't. I think that my former gardener Jesús is a jerk.

Have you accepted Jesus as your personal savior?
No. There is no god. You're living a lie. Get over it.

Why should people punch Jesus?
Not Jesus -- Jesús!

Why didn't you put your wife's picture up and ask people to punch her, too?
Because I thought that after I got Jesús out of the picture Sarah and I could patch things up. I also assumed that the makeup sex for something this big would be incredible.

Doesn't that make you an idiot?
Yes.

A great, big, stupid idiot?
Yes. Fine. Stop rubbing it in.

Is your wife hot?
Ex-wife, and yes.

Can I f**k your [ex]wife?
Got $20 or a six pack? Then probably yes.

And that's why you hate Jesus?
(Sigh) You people just don't listen, do you?