Jesús is a Jerk

[Rwandrall]

Actually, that might make a good video: "Jesus is a Jerk"

Only I mean JC, the Christian icon Jesus. Yes, that Jesus. The one lionized by our society as the fountain of perfect wisdom and the yardstick by which morality is measured. THAT JESUS.

The Jesus who told a rich man to sell all his possessions and give them to the poor and the pontificated about how it's easier for a camel to get through the eye of a needle than a rich man into Heaven. Oddly enough, when one of his disciples objects to the lavish treatment Jesus receives, suggesting they sell the oil and give it to the poor, JC rebukes him saying in effect: "The poor ye will always have but ye will not always have me".

At one point, Jesus tells a parable about slavery and concludes that the slave that doesn't do his master's wishes should be beaten with many stripes.

At the conclusion of another parable, Jesus says that anyone who doesn't wish to serve him should be brought before him and executed.

Jesus tells people to turn the other cheek and love those who hate us but when a community rejects him, he throws tantrums and proclaims that it will be worse for the city in the day of Judgment than it was in the days of Noah.

Jesus will allow divorce if the wife cheats. How about the husband?

Jesus will only help a Caananite woman only once she admits to being a dog.

Jesus preaches peace and promises a bloody, destructive second coming.

Jesus preaches love and any who don't love him will be tossed into Hell.

These are just off the top of my head. I can certainly put together a larger list.

Although i agree that Jesus is a jerk, i would like to point out that the "eye of a needle" metaphor was actually a mistranslation (or so i have heard) : actually, the "eye of the needle" was actually a low door that was only for pedestrians, while camels went through a larger door, so what Jesus meant was even worse, its was that rich people, in their nature, do not belong in Heaven.