Ok, looking at this purely form an English paper perspective, you need to work more on your grammar. In the very first sentence you have singular and plural words mixed together. What grade is this for, somewhere in High School I'm guessing?
It isn't poorly written. If I was an English Teacher (and I almost was), I'd give it a C+. That has nothing to do with the content, mind you, just based on your numerous basic English errors.
It isn't poorly written. If I was an English Teacher (and I almost was), I'd give it a C+. That has nothing to do with the content, mind you, just based on your numerous basic English errors.
“Eternity is a terrible thought. I mean, where's it going to end?”
― Tom Stoppard, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead
― Tom Stoppard, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead
